Bible Study Guides – Caring for the Flock

August 28, 2011 – September 3, 2011

Families for Christ

Key Text

“Feed the flock of God which is among you.” I Peter 5:2.

Study Help: The Adventist Home, 181–186.

Introduction

“Satan is marshalling his hosts; and are we individually prepared for the fearful conflict that is just before us? Are we preparing our children for the great crisis? Are we preparing ourselves and our households to understand the position of our adversaries and their modes of warfare?” The Adventist Home, 186.

1 GUARDING OUR FLOCK

  • Where did God place Adam and Eve and why? Genesis 2:8, 9, 15. After sin, what did God want Adam and Eve to do and to learn? Genesis 3:19, 23.

Note: “The home of our first parents was to be a pattern for other homes as their children should go forth to occupy the earth. … In the surroundings of the holy pair was a lesson for all time—that true happiness is found, not in the indulgence of pride and luxury, but in communion with God through His created works.” The Adventist Home, 132.

“Although the earth was blighted with the curse, nature was still to be man’s lesson book. It could not now represent goodness only. … From nature, which now revealed the knowledge of good and evil, man was continually to receive warning as to the results of sin.” Education, 26.

  • Where is the best place to raise our family and why? Isaiah 32:18.

Note: “Be not controlled by the desire for wealth, the dictates of fashion, or the customs of society. Consider what will tend most to simplicity, purity, health, and real worth. …

“Instead of dwelling where only the works of men can be seen, where the sights and sounds frequently suggest thoughts of evil, where turmoil and confusion bring weariness and disquietude, go where you can look upon the works of God. Find rest of spirit in the beauty and quietude and peace of nature.” The Adventist Home, 131, 132.

2 BEWARE OF INFLUENCE

  • In choosing our home and associations, what counsel does our Lord give us? I John 2:15.

Note: “Life in the cities is false and artificial. The intense passion for money getting, the whirl of excitement and pleasure seeking, the thirst for display, the luxury and extravagance—all are forces that, with the great masses of mankind, are turning the mind from life’s true purpose. They are opening the door to a thousand evils. Upon the youth they have almost irresistible power.” The Adventist Home, 135.

“In choosing a home, God would have us consider, first of all, the moral and religious influences that will surround us and our families.

“We should choose the society most favorable to our spiritual advancement, and avail ourselves of every help within our reach; for Satan will oppose many hindrances to make our progress toward heaven as difficult as possible. We may be placed in trying positions, for many cannot have their surroundings what they would; but we should not voluntarily expose ourselves to influences that are unfavorable to the formation of Christian character.” Ibid., 131.

“The physical surroundings in the cities are often a peril to health.” Ibid., 135.

“To parents He [the Lord] sends the warning cry: Gather your children into your own houses; gather them away from those who are disregarding the commandments of God, who are teaching and practicing evil.” Ibid., 139.

  • What is a more subtle danger that we need to guard against? II Timothy 3:5.

Note: “If we place ourselves among associates whose influence has a tendency to make us forgetful of the high claims the Lord has upon us, we invite temptation and become too weak in moral power to resist it.” The Adventist Home, 459.

“We must not center our affections on worldly relatives, who have no desire to learn the truth. We may seek in every way, while associated with them, to let our light shine; but our words, our deportment, our customs and practices, should not in any sense be molded by their ideas and customs. We are to show forth the truth in all our intercourse with them. If we cannot do this, the less association we have with them the better it will be for our spirituality.” Ibid., 462.

3 TRAINING OUR FLOCK

  • What vocation has God often given His people? Why? Proverbs 27:18; Ecclesiastes 3:13.

Note: “God provided the conditions most favorable for the development of character. The people who were under His direction still pursued the plan of life that He had appointed in the beginning. Those who departed from God built for themselves cities. … But the men who held fast God’s principles of life dwelt among the fields and hills. They were tillers of the soil and keepers of flocks and herds; and in this free, independent life, with its opportunities for labor and study and meditation, they learned of God and taught their children of His works and ways.” The Adventist Home, 181.

  • What does God still desire us to teach our children? Proverbs 12:11; 28:19.

Note: “Working the soil is one of the best kinds of employment, calling the muscles into action and resting the mind. Study in agricultural lines should be the A, B, and C of the education given in our schools. This is the very first work that should be entered upon.” Testimonies, vol. 6, 179.

“Had this course been followed, … the students would have secured an all round education, which would have prepared them, not only for practical work in various trades, but for a place on the Lords’ farm in the earth made new.” Ibid., 177.

  • What kinds of educational facilities are necessary to accomplish this type of education? Psalm 128:3, 4; II Timothy 1:5; 3:14, 15.

Note: “In His wisdom the Lord has decreed that the family shall be the greatest of all educational agencies. It is in the home that the education of the child is to begin. …

“One great reason why there is so much evil in the world today is that parents occupy their minds with other things than that which is all important—how to adapt themselves to the work of patiently and kindly teaching their children the way of the Lord. …

“It is in the home school that our boys and girls are to be prepared to attend the church school.” The Adventist Home, 182, 183, 185.

4 ATTITUDES OF THE TIMES

  • What must we also guard against in our thinking and behavior? I Timothy 6:3–5.
  • What did Jesus warn us about, and how does this apply to today? Matthew 24:37, 38.

Note: “What of the marriage relation today? Is it not perverted and defiled, made even as it was in Noah’s day? Divorce after divorce is recorded in the daily papers. This is the marriage of which Christ speaks when He says that before the flood they were ‘marrying and giving in marriage’ [Matthew 24:38].” Manuscript Releases, vol. 7, 56.

“As it was in the days of Noah, every kind of evil is on the increase. Divorce and marriage is the order of the time.” Ibid., vol. 10, 261.

“Jesus came to our world to rectify mistakes and to restore the moral image of God in man. Wrong sentiments in regard to marriage had found a place in the minds of the teachers of Israel. They were making of none effect the sacred institution of marriage.” The Adventist Home, 341.

  • What should we keep in mind as we face the many varying attitudes of the times in which we live? Matthew 7:13–21; II Corinthians 11:13–15.
  • Who only will be found entering the gates of heaven? Revelation 14:12.

Note: “By beholding we become changed. By the indulgence of impure thoughts man can so educate his mind that sin which he once loathed will become pleasant to him.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 459.

“Those who would not fall a prey to Satan’s devices must guard well the avenues of the soul; they must avoid reading, seeing, or hearing that which will suggest impure thoughts. … ‘Girding up the loins of your mind,’ says the apostle Peter, ‘Be sober, … not fashioning yourselves according to your former lusts in … your ignorance: but like as He which called you is holy, be ye yourselves also holy in all manner of living.’ I Peter 1:13–15, R.V.” Ibid., 460.

5 THE REWARD

  • What is necessary to gain the reward? Joshua 24:15.
  • If we follow God’s counsels, what are the promised results? Galatians 6:9.

Note: “If parents give their children the proper education, they themselves will be made happy by seeing the fruit of their careful training in the Christlike character of their children.” The Adventist Home, 533.

“With joy unutterable, parents see the crown, the robe, the harp, given to their children. The days of hope and fear are ended. The seed sown with tears and prayers may have seemed to be sown in vain, but their harvest is reaped with joy at last. Their children have been redeemed. Fathers, mothers, shall the voices of your children swell the song of gladness in that day?” Child Guidance, 569.

  • What is the other solemn warning concerning the day of reckoning? Jeremiah 2:4, 5, 9.

Note: “ ‘Weighed in the balance, and found wanting’ [Daniel 5:27]. To many parents the Judge will say in that day, ‘You had My Word, plainly setting forth your duty. Why have you not obeyed its teachings? Knew ye not that it was the voice of God? Did I not bid you search the Scriptures, that you might not go astray? You have not only ruined your own souls, but by your pretensions to godliness you have misled many others. You have no part with Me. Depart; depart.’ ” Child Guidance, 569.

PERSONAL REVIEW QUESTIONS

1 What dwelling will give the best place of safety to our flock?

2 From what influences should you separate?

3 What are the ABCs of God’s educational plan?

4 As reformers, what attitudes must your influence work to correct?

5 What is the reward ahead for you?

Copyright © 2002 Reformation Herald Publishing Association, 5240 Hollins Road, Roanoke, Virginia. Reprinted by permission.

Q&A – Duties of Children

Is it required of children to obey their parents when the duties required are not in harmony with the requirements of God?

The command of the Lord is, “Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long in the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee” [Exodus 20:12]. Honor certainly means to obey. But the command assumes that the parent’s requirement will be in harmony with what is right. (See Deuteronomy 6:5–9; Proverbs 22:6.)

It is therefore the parent’s first duty to obey God and train the child aright; and it follows that it is the child’s duty to obey the parent. But if the parent commands the child to do what is contrary to God, and the child knows that it means eternal death to obey the parent, it is the duty of the child to obey God first; eternal life is worth more than this life. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right” [Ephesians 6:1, emphasis added]. But let the child be careful that he faithfully obeys whatever is not against the word of God, however great the hardship involved.

“The obligation resting upon children to honor their parents is of lifelong duration. If the parents are feeble and old, the affection and attention of the children should be bestowed in proportion to the need of father and mother. Nobly, decidedly, the children should shape their course of action even if it requires self-denial, so that every thought of anxiety and perplexity may be removed from the minds of the parents. …

“Children should be educated to love and care tenderly for father and mother. Care for them, children, yourselves; for no other hand can do the little acts of kindness with the acceptance that you can do them. Improve your precious opportunity to scatter seeds of kindness.

“Our obligation to our parents never ceases. Our love for them, and theirs for us, is not measured by years or distance, and our responsibility can never be set aside.

“Let children carefully remember that at the best the aged parents have but little joy and comfort. What can bring greater sorrow to their hearts than manifest neglect on the part of their children? What sin can be worse in children than to bring grief to an aged, helpless father or mother?” The Adventist Home, 360.

Customs of Bible Times – Parental Position in the Home

Unlike within most homes today, in Bible times each member of the family held a certain position in the home, which came with specific duties.

Position of the Father

The Eastern idea of the family is a little kingdom within itself, over which the father is supreme ruler. Every company of travelers, every tribe, every community, every family, must have a father who is the head of the group. A man is said to be the father of what he invents. Jubal “was the father of all such as handle the harp and pipe.” Jabal was “the father of such as dwell in tents, and have cattle” (Genesis 4:20). Because he was a preserver and protector, Joseph said that God made him “a father to Pharoah” (Genesis 45:8). The Eastern mind cannot conceive of any band or group without somebody being the father of it.

Supremacy of the Father Under the Patriarchial System

Under the patriarchial administration, the father is supreme in command. This gives him authority over his wife, his children, his children’s children, his servants, and all of his household. If he is the sheik, it extends to all the tribe. Many of the Bedouins today are under no government except this patriarchial rule. When Abraham, Isaac and Jacob sojourned, living in tents while looking forward to the Promised Land, they were ruled by this same system. And when the law of Moses was given to Israel, the authority of the parent, and especially the father, was still recognized. One of the Ten Commandments is “honour thy father and thy mother” (Exodus 20:12). In many ways the father was the supreme court of appeal in domestic matters.

Succession of Authority

In a majority of cases, the great authority, which the father had, was handed down to his eldest son, who took over the position of leadership upon the death of the father. Thus Isaac became the new sheik over his father’s household upon the death of Abraham. He and Rebekah had been living in that household under his father’s authority, but the succession of authority passed on to him as the son. Ishmael, being son of the handmaid, did not succeed to the place (Genesis 25). In some cases, the father bestowed the succession of authority on other than the eldest son, as when Isaac bestowed it upon Jacob instead of Esau (Genesis 27).

Reverence of the Children for the Father

Reverence of children for their parents, and especially the father, is well-nigh universal in the East down to modern times. Among the Arabs, it is very seldom that a son is heard of as being undutiful. It is quite customary for the child to greet the father in the morning by the kissing of his hand, and following this, to stand before him in an attitude of humility, ready to receive any order or waiting for permission to depart. Following this, the child is often taken upon the lap of the father.

The Mosaic Law demanded obedience to parents, and a rebellious and disobedient son could be punished by death (Deuteronomy 21:18–21). The apostle Paul reiterated the injunction that children must obey their parents (Ephesians 6:1; Colossians 3:20).

Position of the Wife in Relation to the Husband

The wife held a subordinate position to that of her husband, at least in office, not in nature. The ancient Hebrew women did not have unrestrained freedom as the modern women of the Occident [Western world] have. In the East, social intercourse between the sexes is marked by a degree of reserve that is unknown elsewhere. Dr. Thomson says, “Oriental women are never regarded or treated as equals by the men.” They never eat with the men, but the husband and brothers are first served, and the wife, mother, and sisters wait and take what is left; in a walk the women never go arm in arm with the men, but follow at a respectful distance; the woman is, as a rule, kept closely confined, and watched with jealousy; when she goes out she is closely veiled from head to foot. (W. M. Thomson, in early edition of The Land and the Book, quoted and paraphrased by E. P. Barrows in Sacred Geography and Antiquities, American Tract Society, 438.)

This attitude toward women can be illustrated from the Bible. Notice how Jacob’s wives, when traveling, were given places by themselves and not with him (Genesis 32). And nothing is said about the prodigal’s mother being present at the feast, which the father served his son (Luke 15:11–32). All this is in keeping with Eastern custom.

But while these things are true, it must be understood that the Old Testament does not picture the wife as a mere slave of her husband. She is seen to exert tremendous influence for good or ill over her husband, and he showed great respect for her in most cases. Sarah was treated by Abraham as a queen, and in matters of the household, she ruled in many ways. Abraham said to her, concerning Hagar, who had given birth to Ishmael, “Behold, thy maid is in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee” (Genesis 16:6). The tribute to a Hebrew wife and mother in the book of Proverbs indicates that she was a person of great influence with her husband: “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her” (Proverbs 31:11). “She openeth her mouth with wisdom” (verse 26). “Her children arise up and call her blessed; her husband also; and he praiseth her” (verse 28).

Position of the Mother in Relation to the Children

Children in the East show nearly the same respect toward the mothers as they do toward the fathers. The mother is believed to be entitled to honor and to have authority from God. Actually, the father and mother are looked at as being the representatives of God in the matter of authority. They are considered as having this position no matter how poorly they fulfill their obligations. Hebrew children in general held their mothers in great respect, even when they became adults. This may be illustrated by the great influence exerted by queen mothers on the kings of Judah and Israel (I Kings 2:19; II Kings 11:1; 24:12.).

Excerpts from Manners and Customs of Bible Lands, Fred H. Wight, The Moody Institute of Chicago, 1953, 103–106.

Although customs have changed over time and even today are different in the West from those in the East, the significance that the Bible places on parental authority remains unchanged. Honor is still required of children for their mothers and their fathers in keeping with the counsel provided in inspired writings.

Longsuffering

The love of Jesus is the fruit born by the Holy Spirit that gives birth to its graces, which are joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance. In Testimonies, vol. 2, 134 and 135, the following is recorded: “Mildness, gentleness, forbearance, longsuffering, being not easily provoked, bearing all things, hoping all things, enduring all things—these are the fruit growing upon the precious tree of love, which is of heavenly growth.”

It is through the Holy Spirit that Christ dwells in and with the believer making it possible for him or her to possess this fruit. This is made evident in these statements: “The Lord Jesus acts through the Holy Spirit; for it is His representative. Through it He infuses spiritual life into the soul, quickening its energies for good, cleansing it from moral defilement, and giving it a fitness for His kingdom.” Sons and Daughters of God, 282.

On the same page we also read, “Never will the human heart know happiness until it is submitted to be molded by the Spirit of God. The Spirit conforms the renewed soul to the model, Jesus Christ. Through the influence of the Spirit, enmity against God is changed into faith and love, and pride into humility. The soul perceives the beauty of truth, and Christ is honored in excellence and perfection of character.” Ibid.

In the same book is recorded these precious words: “By partaking of the Spirit of God, conforming to the law of God, man becomes a partaker of the divine nature. Christ brings His disciples into a living union with Himself and with the Father. Through the working of the Holy Spirit upon the human mind, man is made complete in Christ Jesus. Unity with Christ establishes a bond of unity with one another. This unity is the most convincing proof to the world of the majesty and virtue of Christ, and of His power to take away sin.

“The powers of darkness stand a poor chance against believers who love one another as Christ has loved them, who refuse to create alienation and strife, who stand together, who are kind, courteous, and tender-hearted, cherishing the faith that works by love and purifies the soul. We must have the Spirit of Christ, or we are none of His.” Ibid., 286.

“Love is the tie that binds our hearts to God as our father; joy is the glad emotion that springs up after our reconciliation with God; peace is the summer calm that settles down upon the soul that has entered into its rest. Love has been called the foundation of the fabric; joy, the superstructure; peace, the crown of the work. Love has a primary place, for it is ‘shed abroad in the heart by the Holy Ghost’ [Romans 5:5]. Joy is dependent upon love, and may well be called ‘joy of the Holy Ghost’ [1 Thessalonians 1:6, last part]. It is enshrined in the very heart of love. It rises and falls, with love itself, like the thin thread of mercury in the thermometer, by the action of the surrounding atmosphere. Pieces linked with joy ‘in believing’ [Romans 15:13]. Peace and joy are the two ingredients of the kingdom of God. It is ‘the peace to which we are called in one body’ [Colossians 3:15], which will keep our hearts and minds in the midst of all worldly agitations.” Pulpit Commentary, vol. 20, Edited by Joseph Exell and H. D. M. Spence, Hendrickson Publishers, Peabody, Massachusetts, 1985, 275.

Let us look at the fruit of longsuffering that grows on the tree of love.

By definition longsuffering in Greek is – mak-ro-thuma, which is forbearance, patience, longsuffering (macros – long and thumos – temper); patience is also a synonym.

William Barclay states, “Makrothumia, this is a great word. The writer of First Maccabees says that it was by makrothumia that the Romans became masters of the world, and by that he means the Roman persistence, which would never make peace with an enemy even in defeat, a kind of conquering patience. Generally speaking the word is not used of patience in regard to things or events but in regard to people. Chysostom said that it is the grace of the man who could revenge himself and does not, the man who is slow to wrath. The most illuminating thing about it is that it is commonly used in the New Testament of the attitude of God towards men. If God had been a man, He would have wiped out this world long ago; but He has that patience which bears with all our sinning … . In our dealings with our fellowmen we must reproduce this loving, forbearing, forgiving, patience attitude of God towards ourselves.” The Letters to the Galatians and Ephesians, William Barclay, Westminster John Knox Press, Louisville, KY, 2002, 50, 51.

“Longsuffering bears something, yea, many things, without seeking to be avenged by word or act.

“ ‘Long-suffering’ is patience with offence; long endurance. If you are longsuffering, you will not impart to others your supposed knowledge of your brother’s mistakes and errors. You will seek to help and save him, because he has been purchased with the blood of Christ.” My Life Today, 52. “He which converteth the sinner from the error of his way shall save a soul from death, and shall hide a multitude of sins.” James 5:20.

Robert South, the English poet who lived from 1634 to 1716, penned these memorable words on forbearance: “It is a noble and great thing to cover the blemishes and excuse the failings of a friend; to draw a curtain before his stains, and display his perfection; to bury his weaknesses in silence, but to proclaim his virtues on a house-top.” The New Dictionary of Thoughts, Tyron Edwards; C.N. Catrevas, Standard Book Company, New York, 1955, 216.

Longsuffering or forbearance is of divine origin: “It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.” Lamentations 3:22.

“Or let him take hold of My strength, that he may make peace with Me; and he shall make peace with Me.” Isaiah 27:5.

“Who is a God like unto Thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and passeth by the transgression of the remnant of His heritage? He retaineth not His anger for ever, because He delighteth in mercy.” Micah 7:18.

“And the Lord passed by before him, and proclaimed, The Lord, The Lord God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abundant in goodness and truth.” Exodus 34:6.

“Or despisest thou the riches of His goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?” Romans 2:4.

“But thou, O Lord, art a God full of compassion, and gracious, longsuffering, and plenteous in mercy and truth.” Psalm 86:15.

Longsuffering is that quality of self-restraint in the face of provocation which does not hastily retaliate or promptly punish; it is the opposite of anger and is associated with mercy, as used of God.

Longsuffering—Two Areas

  1. Man’s longsuffering toward his fellowmen
  2. God’s longsuffering toward sinners

I will address only number one:

Man’s Longsuffering Toward His Fellowmen

The great apostle Paul admonishing the Ephesian Christians wrote, “I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, with all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love.” Ephesians 4:1, 2.

In his epistle to the Colossian Christians he tells us how to display longsuffering: “That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, unto all patience and longsuffering with joyfulness.” Colossians 1:10, 11.

It is impossible to have longsuffering without first experiencing joy in the Holy Spirit! Paul shows to the Colossians that love or charity is the fundamental element necessary in the life of the Christian to experience longsuffering and to exercise it to others. “Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.” Colossians 3:12–14.

The apostle describes the reason for mercy being shown to him by Jesus Christ: “This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptation, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief. Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might show forth all longsuffering, for a pattern to them which should hereafter believe on him to life everlasting.” I Timothy 1:15, 16.

In our effort to point lost humanity to Christ, Paul counsels us to do it with much longsuffering: “Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine.”
II Timothy 4:2.

Forbearance or longsuffering MUST be cultivated in the home!

“If we are courteous and gentle at home, we shall carry the savor of a pleasant disposition when away from home. If we manifest forbearance, patience, meekness, and fortitude in the home, we shall be able to be a light to the world.” The Adventist Home, 429.

“We can manifest a thousand little attentions in friendly words and pleasant looks, which will be reflected upon us again. Thoughtless Christians manifest by their neglect of others that they are not in union with Christ. It is impossible to be in union with Christ and yet be unkind to others and forgetful of their rights.” Testimonies, vol. 3, 539.

“Those who profess to be followers of Christ and are at the same time rough, unkind, and uncourteous in words and deportment have not learned of Jesus.” The Adventist Home, 427.

Parents should set examples of forbearance or longsuffering.

“Parents should so conduct themselves that their lives will be a daily lesson of self-control and forbearance to their household.” Temperance, 180.

In counseling a wife and husband who were members of the church, Ellen White instructed them concerning the will of God for them. “You should cultivate the charity and longsuffering of Christ. By a watchful, suspicious spirit in regard to the motives and conduct of others, you frequently counteract the good you have done. You are cherishing a feeling that is chilling in its influence, that repulses, but does not attract and win. You must be willing to become as yielding and forbearing in your disposition as you desire others to be. Selfish love of your own opinions and ways will, in a great measure, destroy your power to do the good you are desirous of doing.” Testimonies, vol. 4, 61.

Here is where many Christians fail when wrong is done to them; they fail to show even an ounce of longsuffering or forbearance, but listen to this statement found in the book, The Ministry of Healing, 487: “So long as we are in the world, we shall meet with adverse influences. There will be provocations to test the temper; and it is by meeting these in a right spirit that the Christian graces are developed. If Christ dwells in us, we shall be patient, kind, and forbearing, cheerful amid frets and irritations. Day by day and year by year we shall conquer self, and grow into a noble heroism. This is our allotted task; but it cannot be accomplished without help from Jesus, resolute decision, unwavering purpose, continual watchfulness, and unceasing prayer. Each one has a personal battle to fight. Not even God can make our characters noble or our lives useful, unless we become co-workers with Him. Those who decline the struggle lose the strength and joy of victory.”

There is a terrible misunderstanding that many Christians hold to concerning the attitude toward the erring one. They say that kindness and longsuffering should never cease toward the erring in the church. Is this the attitude to be displayed towards those who willfully continue in transgression and sin?

Counsel is given to us concerning this matter: “To hate and reprove sin, and at the same time to show pity and tenderness for the sinner, is a difficult attainment. The more earnest our own efforts to attain to holiness of heart and life, the more acute will be our perception of sin and the more decided our disapproval of any deviation from the right. We must guard against undue severity toward the wrongdoer, but we must also be careful not to lose sight of the exceeding sinfulness of sin. There is need of showing Christlike patience and love for the erring one, but there is also danger of showing so great toleration for his error that he will look upon himself as undeserving of reproof, and will reject it as uncalled for and unjust.

“Ministers of the gospel sometimes do great harm by allowing their forbearance toward the erring to degenerate into toleration of sins and even participation in them. Thus they are led to excuse and palliate that which God condemns, and after a time they become so blinded as to commend the very ones whom God commands them to reprove. He who has blunted his spiritual perceptions by sinful leniency toward those whom God condemns, will erelong commit a greater sin by severity and harshness toward those whom God approves.” The Acts of the Apostles, 504.

The English orator and statesman Edmund Burke emphatically declares: “There is a limit at which forbearance ceases to be a virtue.” Edwards, 216.

In Prophets and Kings, 236, Ellen White states, “Even kindness should have its limits.”

There will always be those members in the church who will disregard the words of God. Therefore, it is felt that they should be disassociated from the church and no forbearance be shown. Paul instructed the Thessalonian Christians: “And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man, and have no company with him, that he may be ashamed. Yet count him not as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.” II Thessalonians 3:14, 15.

Paul counsels the brother to note or mark those who willfully disregard the word of God and have no company, association, or mix up together with them. But those who are marked must not be treated as an enemy; forbearance must be shown with the hope that they will repent.

The Scriptures declare, “And grieve not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.” Ephesians 4:30. We have established that a divine element of the Holy Spirit is longsuffering, yet the Holy Scriptures declare that the Holy Spirit can be grieved to the point that He gives up on a sinner. You see, the words “grieve not” can be rightly translated “stop grieving the Holy Spirit.” This clearly shows an ongoing practice, a habitual attitude in spite of much counsel, pleading, advice and expressions of love.

No wonder David prayed, “Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.” Psalm 51: 11.

So then if the Holy Spirit can be grieved to the point of giving up on a sinner, it stands true therefore that once a person is under the control of the Holy Spirit in spite of how much love there be for sinners and unrepentant human beings, that person has got to let go or cease showing forbearance and say, in the words of the prophet Hosea, “Ephraim is joined to idols: let him alone.” Hosea 4:17.

Today the call comes to each and everyone: “The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.” II Peter 3:9 Amen!

Pastor Ivan Plummer ministers through the Emmanuel Seventh Day Church Ministries in Bronx, New York. He may be contacted by telephone at: 718-882-3900.

Bible Study Guides – Infancy: The First Seven Years

May 20, 2012 – May 26, 2012

Key Text

“Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings hast thou ordained strength because of thine enemies, that thou mightest still the enemy and the avenger.” Psalm 8:2.

Study Help: Child Guidance, 193–198; The Adventist Home, 255–269.

Introduction

“Infancy extends to the age of six or seven years. Up to this period, children should be left, like little lambs, to roam around the house and in the yards, skipping and jumping in the buoyancy of their spirits, free from care and trouble.” A Solemn Appeal, 133.

1 PRENATAL INFLUENCES

  • What can we learn from the instructions given by heavenly angels to some prospective parents, soon to be educators? Judges 13:1–14; Luke 1:5, 11–15.

Note: “The effect of prenatal influences is by many parents looked upon as a matter of little moment; but Heaven does not so regard it. The message sent by an angel of God, and twice given in the most solemn manner, shows it to be deserving of our most careful thought.

“In the words spoken to the Hebrew mother, God speaks to all mothers in every age. … The well-being of the child will be affected by the habits of the mother. Her appetites and passions are to be controlled by principle. There is something for her to shun, something for her to work against, if she fulfills God’s purpose for her in giving her a child. If before the birth of her child she is self-indulgent, if she is selfish, impatient, and exacting, these traits will be reflected in the disposition of the child. …

“But if the mother unswervingly adheres to right principles, if she is temperate and self-denying, if she is kind, gentle, and unselfish, she may give her child these same precious traits of character.” Counsels on Diet and Foods, 217.

2 THE BABY HAS ARRIVED . . . AND IT GROWS!

  • If God entrusts us with a baby, why should we constantly pray for wisdom? Psalm 127:3; I Corinthians 3:2, first part; 10:31.

Note: “The best food for the infant is the food that nature provides. Of this it should not be needlessly deprived. It is a heartless thing for a mother, for the sake of convenience or social enjoyment, to seek to free herself from the tender office of nursing her little one.

“The period in which the infant receives its nourishment from the mother is critical. Many mothers, while nursing their infants, have been permitted to overlabor and to heat their blood in cooking; and the nursling has been seriously affected, not only with fevered nourishment from the mother’s breast, but its blood has been poisoned by the unhealthy diet of the mother, which has fevered her whole system, thereby affecting the food of the infant. The infant will also be affected by the condition of the mother’s mind. …

“The character also of the child is more or less affected by the nature of the nourishment received from the mother. How important then that the mother, while nursing her infant, should preserve a happy state of mind, having the perfect control of her own spirit. By thus doing, the food of the child is not injured, and the calm, self-possessed course the mother pursues in the treatment of her child has very much to do in molding the mind of the infant. If it is nervous and easily agitated, the mother’s careful, unhurried manner will have a soothing and correcting influence, and the health of the infant can be very much improved.” The Adventist Home, 260, 261.

“No general rules can be established in the care of all infants, in consequence of their almost endless varieties of condition at birth, and their different constitutional wants.

“The term properly called infancy, requires several changes as to the periods of taking food. Before birth it is receiving nourishment constantly. And the changes from this to the establishment of only two meals a day, which may, in most children, be done from the ages of one to three years, must be gradual.” The Review and Herald, April 14, 1868.

“The lessons that the child learns during the first seven years of life have more to do with forming his character than all that it learns in future years.” Child Guidance, 193.

3 BASIC EARLY LESSONS

  • After the first joyful moments of parenthood, what sad reality also comes to light? II Timothy 3:2. What parental mistakes often follow?

Note: “One of the signs of the ‘last days’ is the disobedience of children to their parents [11 Timothy 3:2]. And do parents realize their responsibility? Many seem to lose sight of the watch-care they should ever have over their children, and suffer them to indulge in evil passions, and to disobey them. They take but little notice of them until their own feelings are raised, and then punish them in anger.” The Review and Herald, September 19, 1854.

“You should correct your children in love. Do not let them have their own way until you get angry, and then punish them. Such correction only helps on the evil, instead of remedying it. After you have done your duty faithfully to your children, then carry them to God and ask Him to help you.” Ibid.

  • What warning must we heed regarding God’s house? Genesis 28:17; Leviticus 19:30, last part; Habbakuk 2:20.

Note: “The house of God is often desecrated by Sabbath-keepers’ children. Their parents allow them to run about the house, play, talk, take the attention of the people, and manifest their evil tempers in the very meetings where they have assembled to worship God. I have seen that in the assembly of the saints a holy stillness should reign. But the house where God’s people assemble is often made a perfect babylon, a place of confusion and disorder. This is displeasing to God. If the parents have not government, and cannot control their children in meeting, God would be better pleased for them to remain at home with their unruly children. They had better suffer the loss of meetings, than to have a large number annoyed, and their meetings spoiled. If parents leave their children uncontrolled, unsubdued at home, they cannot have them do as they wish in meeting. Who should be the sufferers in this case? Certainly, the parents. They should not feel afflicted if others do not wish to have their peace disturbed when they meet to worship God.” Spiritual Gifts, vol. 2, 288, 289.

4 WE NEED HELP!

  • What curse rests upon the disobedient nations today? Isaiah 3:1–4.

Note: “As parents who profess to love the Lord Jesus Christ, we should see to it that the spirit of peace is in our households. God commands us to take our children and fashion them after the divine similitude. From their earliest life children should be taught to obey their parents, to respect their word, and to reverence their authority. But many allow Satan to take their children under control, and in their early life the spirit of Satan manifests itself in the little ones in passionate screams or in sullen manners. One child under the control of this evil disposition will disturb the whole household, and banish peace from its borders. Parents should take time to discipline their children. Our most precious time belongs to our own flesh and blood. Never let your child hear you say, ‘I cannot do anything with you.’ As long as we may have access to the throne of God, we as parents should be ashamed to utter any such a word. Cry unto Jesus, and He will help you to bring your little ones to Him, and to keep them out of the power of the enemy. If Satan cannot succeed in ruling the fathers and the mothers, he will try with all his power to control the children, and make them rebel against God, and become disturbers of the peace of a family.

“Parents, you have a solemn responsibility resting upon you. It is your duty to co-operate with Christ in aiding your children to form right characters. Jesus can do nothing without your co-operation. It is not mercy or kindness to permit a child to have [his] own way, to submit to [his] rule, and to neglect to correct [him] on the ground that you love [him] too well to punish [him]. What kind of love is it that permits your child to develop traits of character that will make him and every one else miserable? Away with such love! True love will look out for the present and eternal good of the soul. …

“Do not indulge your children in evil ways, but from their very infancy let them see that you love the Lord, and that you mean to train them up as He would have you. … Of what avail will be a list of church resolutions, if we have not the Spirit of God in our homes? Christ is watching to see who are training their families for the great family above. Suppose one of your little children whom you have failed to correct, should be taken away in one of its fits of temper, what would be the result? I leave you to answer the question.” The Review and Herald, July 16, 1895.

5 CHOOSING GOODNESS

  • What woe must God’s people determine to avoid? Isaiah 3:12.

Note: “Parents, if you wish the minds of your children to be evil, let them have their own way.” The Signs of the Times, February 18, 1897.

  • Why is the example of Hannah an inspiration? I Samuel 1:20–22.

Note: “From the earliest dawn of intellect she [Hannah] had taught her son to love and reverence God, and to regard himself as the Lord’s.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 572.

“During the first three years of the life of Samuel the prophet, his mother carefully taught him to distinguish between good and evil.” Child Guidance, 197.

  • Name some things to teach during infancy and childhood. Matthew 5:8; Philippians 4:8.

Note: “During the first six or seven years of a child’s life, special attention should be given to its physical training, rather than the intellect.” Child Guidance, 300.

“From their infancy, children should be taught lessons of purity. Mothers cannot too early begin to fill the minds of their children with pure, holy thoughts. And one way of doing this is to keep everything about them clean and pure. Mothers, if you desire your children’s thoughts to be pure, let their surroundings be pure. Let their sleeping rooms be scrupulously neat and clean. Teach them to care for their clothing.” Counsels on Health, 103.

PERSONAL REVIEW QUESTIONS

1 In pregnancy, what can both parents do for their baby’s character?

2 How does the way an infant is nourished affect his or her character?

3 Why must we take heed of our infants’ behavior in public worship?

4 How do many misinterpret the essence of true parental love?

5 What priority of Hannah should be shared by us today?

© 2005 Reformation Herald Publishing Association, Roanoke, Virginia. Reprinted by permission.