family

The Family Firm

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March 2 – 8, 2025

Key Text

“My son, keep your father’s command, and do not forsake the law of your mother.” Proverbs 6:20

Study Help: Child Guidance, 244–267

Introduction

“A sacred trust is committed to parents, to guard the physical and moral constitutions of their children, so that the nervous system may be well balanced, and the soul not endangered. Fathers and mothers should understand the laws of life, that they may not, through ignorance, allow wrong tendencies to develop in their children.” Fundamentals of Christian Education, 143

Sunday

1 A SIGHT PLEASING TO GOD AND ANGELS

  1. What is the Biblical counsel to children? Proverbs 1:8, 9; Ephesians 6:1–3

Note: “A well-regulated, orderly family is a pleasing sight to God and ministering angels. You must learn how to make a home orderly, comfortable, and pleasant. Then adorn that home with becoming dignity, and the spirit will be received by the children; and order, regularity, and obedience will be more readily secured by both of you.” Testimonies, Vol. 2, 259

“Fathers and mothers who make God first in their households, who teach their children that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, glorify God before angels and before men by presenting to the world a well-ordered, well-disciplined family, a family that love and obey God instead of rebelling against Him. Christ is not a stranger in their homes; His name is a household name, revered and glorified. Angels delight in a home where God reigns supreme, and the children are taught to reverence religion, the Bible, and their Creator.” The Adventist Home, 322

“The family firm must be well organized. Together the father and mother must consider their responsibilities, and with a clear comprehension undertake their task. There is to be no variance. The father and mother should never in the presence of their children criticize each other’s plans and judgment.” Ibid., 314

Monday

2 THE FATHER IN THE FAMILY FIRM

2.a. What is the Biblical counsel to fathers? Ephesians 6:4

Note: “The children look to the father for support and guidance; he needs to have a right conception of life and of the influences and associations that should surround his family; above all, he should be controlled by the love and fear of God and by the teaching of His word, that he may guide the feet of his children in the right way.” The Adventist Home, 211

2.b.      What will enable the father to make the home a happy, peaceful place? Philippians 2:5

Note: “The father should do his part toward making home happy. Whatever his cares and business perplexities, they should not be permitted to overshadow his family; he should enter his home with smiles and pleasant words.” The Adventist Home, 211, 212

“The father is to stand at the head of his family, not as an overgrown, undisciplined boy, but as a man with manly character and with his passions controlled. He is to obtain an education in correct morals. His conduct in his home life is to be directed and restrained by the pure principles of the word of God.” Ibid., 213

2.c. What are fathers especially cautioned about in regard to their children? Colossians 3:21

Note: “The husband and father is the head of the household. The wife looks to him for love and sympathy and for aid in the training of the children. …

“What his influence will be in the home will be determined by his knowledge of the only true God and Jesus Christ whom He has sent.” The Adventist Home, 211, 213

“The Lord has constituted the husband the head of the wife to be her protector; he is the house-band of the family, binding the members together.” Ibid., 215

Tuesday

3 THE MOTHER IN THE FAMILY FIRM

3.a. What is the mother’s role in the home? Proverbs 31:10–30

Note: “The world needs mothers who are mothers not merely in name but in every sense of the word. We may safely say that the distinctive duties of woman are more sacred, more holy, than those of man. Let woman realize the sacredness of her work and in the strength and fear of God take up her life mission.” The Adventist Home, 231

3.b.      In what ways does Hannah, the mother of Samuel, serve as a positive example for mothers today? 1 Samuel 1:11–16; 1 Samuel 2:2–10

Note: “What a reward was Hannah’s! and what an encouragement to faithfulness is her example! There are opportunities of inestimable worth, interests infinitely precious, committed to every mother. … It is the mother’s privilege to bless the world by her influence, and in doing this she will bring joy to her own heart.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 572

3.c. List the good and also the evil relationships that a child can have with his mother. Proverbs 4:3; 5:20; 6:20; 10:1; 14:36; 20:20; 23:22; 28:24; 29:15; 30:11, 17

Note: “The mother is God’s agent to Christianize her family. She is to exemplify biblical religion, showing how its influence is to control us in its everyday duties and pleasures, teaching her children that by grace alone can they be saved, through faith, which is the gift of God.” The Adventist Home, 235

“Mothers, awake to the fact that your influence and example are affecting the character and destiny of your children; and in view of your responsibility, develop a well-balanced mind, and a pure character, reflecting only the true, the good, and the beautiful.

“Your compassionate Redeemer is watching you with love and sympathy, ready to hear your prayers, and to render you the assistance which you need. He knows the burdens of every mother’s heart and is her best friend in every emergency.” Reflecting Christ, 170

Wednesday

4 OTHER FACTORS

4.a. What commendation did Abraham receive for his conduct as a father? Genesis 18:19

Note: “Christ prayed for His disciples, not that they should be taken out of the world, but that they should be kept from evil—that they might be kept from yielding to the temptations they would meet on every hand. This is a prayer that should be offered up by every father and mother. But should they thus plead with God in behalf of their children, and then leave them to do as they please? Should they pamper the appetite until it gets the mastery, and then expect to restrain the children?—No; temperance and self-control should be taught from the very cradle up.” Christian Education, 166

4.b.      What was David’s example of daily prayer? Psalm 55:17. What was Daniel’s example of daily prayer? Daniel 6:10

Note: “If ever there was a time when every house should be a house of prayer, it is now. Fathers and mothers should often lift up their hearts to God in humble supplication for themselves and their children.” Christian Education, 221

4.c. What else should parents remember to do on behalf of their children? Malachi 3:16, first part; Deuteronomy 11:18-20

Note: “Brother L, … you do not speak wisely and judiciously to your wife and children. You should cultivate kindness and gentleness. Your children have not had the best influence and example before them. They should not control you, but you them, not harshly, not overbearingly, but with firmness and steadiness of purpose.

“Sister L, you have a great battle before you in order to overcome. You have let self keep the victory. Your stubborn will is the greatest enemy you have. You have an unsubdued temper and do not control your tongue. The lack of self-control has been a great injury to yourself and to your family. Happiness, quietude, and peace have abode in your dwelling but a short period at a time. If your will is crossed you are easily irritated, and then you speak and act as though a demon had possession of you. Angels turn from the scene of discord where angry words are exchanged.” Testimonies, Vol. 2, 78, 79

Thursday

5 SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS

5.a. What lesson of tender care toward the wife and children should Christian fathers learn from Jacob’s example? Genesis 33:13, 14

Note: “The average father wastes many golden opportunities to attract and bind his children to him. Upon returning home from his business, he should find it a pleasant change to spend some time with his children.

“Fathers should unbend from their false dignity, deny themselves some slight self-gratification in time and leisure, in order to mingle with the children, sympathizing with them in their little troubles, binding them to their hearts by the strong bonds of love, and establishing such an influence over their expanding minds that their counsel will be regarded as sacred.” The Adventist Home, 220

5.b.      What promise may faithful parents claim in the training of their children? Isaiah 49:25, last part

Note: “Let the father, as priest of the household, lay upon the altar of God the morning and evening sacrifice, while the wife and children unite in prayer and praise. In such a household, Jesus will love to tarry.” Christian Education, 221

“Parents stand in the place of God to their children, and they will have to render an account, whether they have been faithful to the little few committed to their care.” The Review and Herald, March 28, 1893

“The sphere of the mother may be humble; but her influence, united with the father’s, is as abiding as eternity.” The Adventist Home, 240

Friday

PERSONAL REVIEW QUESTIONS

1    How can parents make their homes a pleasing site for God and angels?

2    Explain the characteristic virtues of the husband and father and those of the wife and mother.

3    How are the distinct duties of a woman more sacred than those of a man?

4    What is a key factor in ensuring the presence of Jesus in the family home?

5    Mention some of the burdens that parents can share in the home circle.

Copyright 2006, Reformation Herald Publishing Association, 5240 Hollins Road, Roanoke, Virginia 24019-5048, U.S.A.

The Nurturing Family

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January 5 – 11, 2025

Key Text

“Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine in the very heart of your house, your children like olive plants all around your table.” Psalm 128:3

Study Help: Testimonies, Vol. 3, 230–232

Introduction

“God would have our families symbols of the family in heaven.” The Adventist Home, 17

Sunday

1 OUR FIRST HUMAN RELATIONSHIP

1.a.      How does God use the unique relationship of parents to child to illustrate the tenderness of His great love for us? Psalm 103:13; Isaiah 66:13

1.b.     Which commandment does this call to mind? Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:2-3

1.c.      Why should faithfulness to this commandment spring forth in spontaneous gratitude from the truly converted soul? Proverbs 4:1–4

Note: “Children should feel that they are indebted to their parents, who have watched over them in their infancy, and nursed them in sickness. They should realize that their parents have suffered much anxiety on their account. Especially have conscientious, godly parents felt the deepest interest that their children should take a right course. As they have seen faults in their children, how heavy have been their hearts. If the children who caused those hearts to ache could see the effect of their course, they would certainly relent. If they could see their mother’s tears, and hear her prayers to God in their behalf, if they could listen to her suppressed and broken sighs, their hearts would feel, and they would speedily confess their wrongs and ask to be forgiven.” Spiritual Gifts, Vol 4b, 138

Monday

2 A SAD DETERIORATION

2.a.      What widespread characteristic of people is especially plaguing the families in these last days? Proverbs 30:11–14; 2Timothy 3:1-2

Note: “The sin which exists in this generation among children is that they are ‘disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God.’ And this state of things exists to such an extent that it is made a subject of prophecy as one of the signs that we are living in the last days of time.” Letters to Young Lovers, 53

“Rebellion and apostasy are in the very air we breathe. We shall be affected by it unless we by faith hang our helpless souls upon Christ.” The Seventh–day Adventist Bible Commentary, Vol. 1, 1114

2.b.     What solemn warnings should we keep in mind, particularly as we see the conditions existing in today’s society? Proverbs 1:8; 19:26; 20:20

2.c.      What attitude can we glean from Isaac’s marriage? Genesis 24:1–4, 66, 67

Note: “In ancient times, marriage engagements were generally made by the parents, and this was the custom among those who worshiped God. None were required to marry those whom they could not love; but in the bestowal of their affections the youth were guided by the judgment of their experienced, God-fearing parents. It was regarded as a dishonor to parents, and even a crime, to pursue a course contrary to this.

“Isaac, trusting to his father’s wisdom and affection, was satisfied to commit the matter to him, believing also that God Himself would direct in the choice made.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 171

“What a contrast between the course of Isaac and that pursued by the youth of our time, even among professed Christians! Young people too often feel that the bestowal of their affections is a matter in which self alone should be consulted—a matter that neither God nor their parents should in any wise control.” Ibid., 175

Tuesday

3 ELDERLY PARENTS

3.a.      Why does God’s voice in the fifth commandment continue to echo through the ages with deep resonance when our parents become aged? Proverbs 23:22

Note: “There is no time when children should withhold respect and love from their father and mother. While the parents live, it should be the children’s joy to honor and respect them. They should bring all the cheerfulness and sunshine into the life of the aged parents, that they possibly can. They should smooth their pathway to the grave. There is no better recommendation in this world than that a child has honored his parents, no better record in the books of heaven than that he has loved and honored father and mother.

“Let children carefully remember that at the best the aged parents have but little joy and comfort. What can bring greater sorrow to their hearts than manifest neglect on the part of their children? What sin can be worse in children than to bring grief to an aged, helpless father or mother? Those who grieve their aged parents are written in the books of heaven as commandment breakers, as those who do not reverence the God of heaven, and unless they repent and forsake their evil ways, they will not be found worthy of a place in the saints’ inheritance.

“Is it possible that children can become so dead to the claims of father and mother that they will not willingly remove all causes of sorrow in their power, watching over them with unwearying care and devotion? Can it be possible that they will not regard it a pleasure to make the last days of their parents their best days? How can a son or daughter be willing to leave father or mother on the hands of strangers for them to care for! Even were the mother an unbeliever and disagreeable, it would not release the child from the obligation that God has placed upon him to care for his parent. Would that there were but few who would utterly ignore the duty that is due from a child to his mother. Alas! that there are so many who never bestow a thought upon their parents, except it be that they may gain some advantage from them. … But how bitter will be the close of the life of such children! They can have no happy reflection in their old age; for they will reap as they have sown.” The Review and Herald, November 15, 1892

3.b.     How did Jesus disclose the Pharisees’ disregard of the fifth commandment? Mark 7:9–13. How did His own behavior stand in clear contrast to their gross hypocrisy? John 19:25–27

Wednesday

4 CHRIST, THE GREAT CENTER

4.a.      As revealed from the time of ancient Israel, why is morning and evening worship essential? 2Chronicles 13:10–12 How should family worship be conducted in our days? 

Note: “It should be the special object of the heads of the family to make the hour of worship intensely interesting. By a little thought and careful preparation for this season, when we come into the presence of God, family worship can be made pleasant and will be fraught with results that eternity alone will reveal. Let the father select a portion of Scripture that is interesting and easily understood; a few verses will be sufficient to furnish a lesson which may be studied and practiced through the day. Questions may be asked, a few earnest, interesting remarks made, or incident, short and to the point, may be brought in by way of illustration. At least a few verses of spirited song may be sung, and the prayer offered should be short and pointed. The one who leads in prayer should not pray about everything, but should express his needs in simple words and praise God with thanksgiving.” The Signs of the Times, August 7, 1884

4.b.     What is the keynote of life to be learned whether the family be large or small? Philippians 2:1–4

Note: “God would have our families symbols of the family in heaven. Let parents and children bear this in mind every day, relating themselves to one another as members of the family of God. Then their lives will be of such a character as to give to the world an object lesson of what families who love God and keep His commandments may be. Christ will be glorified; His peace and grace and love will pervade the family circle like a precious perfume.” The Review and Herald, November 17, 1896

4.c.      How are children to reflect the childhood of Jesus? Luke 2:52

Note: “Very early the lesson of helpfulness should be taught the child. As soon as strength and reasoning power are sufficiently developed, he should be given duties to perform in the home.” The Ministry of Healing, 401

Thursday

5 A TRAINING GROUND FOR SERVICE

5.a.      What is God’s plan for our families? Psalm 128:1–6

Note: “All heaven is interested in your home. … Set your own heart in order. An unreserved surrender to God will sweep away the barriers that have so long defied the approaches of heavenly grace.” The Signs of the Times, November 11, 1903

5.b.     How is victory assured even to those who themselves may not have grown up under the best of circumstances? Philippians 3:13, 14

Note: “Notwithstanding children may not have had the right instruction, and their characters not have been properly molded, God proposes to connect them with Himself as He did Nadab and Abihu, if they will heed His commands. If they will with faith and courage bring their will in submission to the will of God, He will teach them, and their lives may be like the pure white lily, full of fragrance on the stagnant waters. They must resolve in the strength of Jesus to control inclination and passion, and every day win victories over Satan’s temptations.” The Signs of the Times, July 8, 1880

5.c.      What are the best character traits we can bequeath to help our children obtain a mature Christian character? Micah 6:8; Colossians 1:10; Colossians 2:6

Note: “The more fully the spirit of true ministry pervades the home, the more fully it will be developed in the lives of the children. They will learn to find joy in service and sacrifice for the good of others.” The Ministry of Healing, 401

Friday

PERSONAL REVIEW QUESTIONS

1          What are some good ways by which we can brighten the life of our parents?

2          What was Christ’s example with regard to His parents?

3          How can we encourage more Christ-centered homes?

4          Why has God ordained the family unit to nurture human beings?

Copyright 2006, Reformation Herald Publishing Association, 5240 Hollins Road, Roanoke, Virginia 24019-5048, U.S.A.

You, Mother, Surpass Them All

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Nothing I could write would better express how important the mother’s position is in the family than the Spirit of Prophecy quotations below. I should have included this in the May issue since Mother’s Day is in May, but May had passed before I read this in my morning devotions. While this described my own mother to me, I know that it likely describes your mother, too, or someone to whom you looked for love and guidance.

If there are times when you feel unappreciated or discouraged, remember that God gave mothers the most important work of all, and you can, coupled with His power, raise children who will love God and be happy to work in His service. This can include anyone—grandmother, aunt, sister, teacher, friend, even a single father—who assumes the responsibility for raising or assisting in raising a child.

“There is a God above, and the light and glory from His throne rests upon the faithful mother as she tries to educate her children to resist the influence of evil. No other work can equal hers in importance. She has not, like the artist, to paint a form of beauty upon canvas, nor, like the sculptor, to chisel it from marble. She has not, like the author, to embody a noble thought in words of power, nor, like the musician, to express a beautiful sentiment in melody. It is hers, with the help of God, to develop in a human soul the likeness of the divine.” The Ministry of Healing, 377, 378

Is it any wonder that the devil works so hard to destroy families?

“The mother who appreciates this will regard her opportunities as priceless. Earnestly will she seek, in her own character and by her methods of training, to present before her children the highest ideal. Earnestly, patiently, courageously, she will endeavor to improve her own abilities, that she may use aright the highest powers of the mind in the training of her children. Earnestly will she inquire at every step, ‘What hath God spoken?’ Diligently, she will study His word. She will keep her eyes fixed upon Christ, that her own daily experience, in the lowly round of care and duty, may be a true reflection of the one true Life.” Ibid., 378

Do not be discouraged, mothers.

“Her children rise up and call her blessed.” Proverbs 31:28, first part

Dear Lord, please send strength, comfort, satisfaction, and joy to all, especially our mothers, who have the privilege of raising children for You. May they, and their children, reflect You in every circumstance and in every place.

Mother – Queen of the Household

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The king upon his throne has no higher work than has the mother. The mother is queen of her household. She has in her power the molding of her children’s characters, that they may be fitted for the higher, immortal life. An angel could not ask for a higher mission; for in doing this work she is doing service for God. Let her only realize the high character of her task, and it will inspire her with courage. Let her realize the worth of her work and put on the whole armor of God, that she may resist the temptation to conform to the world’s standard. Her work is for time and for eternity. …

There are opportunities of inestimable worth, interests infinitely precious, committed to every mother. The humble round of duties which women have come to regard as a wearisome task should be looked upon as a grand and noble work. It is the mother’s privilege to bless the world by her influence, and in doing this she will bring joy to her own heart. She may make straight paths for the feet of her children through sunshine and shadow to the glorious heights above. But it is only when she seeks, in her own life, to follow the teachings of Christ that the mother can hope to form the character of her children after the divine pattern. …

There is a God above, and the light and glory from His throne rests upon the faithful mother as she tries to educate her children to resist the influence of evil. No other work can equal hers in importance. She has not, like the artist, to paint a form of beauty upon canvas; nor, like the sculptor, to chisel it from marble. She has not, like the author, to embody a noble thought in words of power; nor, like the musician, to express a beautiful sentiment in melody. It is hers, with the help of God, to develop in a human soul the likeness of the divine.

The mother who appreciates this will regard her opportunities as priceless. Earnestly will she seek, in her own character and by her methods of training, to present before her children the highest ideal. Earnestly, patiently, courageously, she will endeavor to improve her own abilities, that she may use aright the highest powers of the mind in the training of her children. Earnestly will she inquire at every step, “What hath God spoken?” Diligently she will study His word. She will keep her eyes fixed upon Christ, that her own daily experience, in the lowly round of care and duty, may be a true reflection of the one true Life. …

Let every mother feel that her moments are priceless; her work will be tested in the solemn day of accounts. Then it will be found that many of the failures and crimes of men and women have resulted from the ignorance and neglect of those whose duty it was to guide their childish feet in the right way. Then it will be found that many who have blessed the world with the light of genius and truth and holiness owe the principles that were the mainspring of their influence and success to a praying, Christian mother.

The Adventist Home, 231–239

Remember Lot’s Wife

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There are a few verses in the Bible that consist of fewer than five words:

Jesus wept. John 11:35
Quench not the Spirit. 1 Thessalonians 5:19
Pray without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:17
Remember Lot’s wife. Luke 17:32

I want to study with you Luke 17:32: “Remember Lot’s wife.”

We find the story of Lot in the book of Genesis, but it is spoken of a number of times throughout the Bible. In the account found in Luke, Jesus was telling His disciples what to expect at the end of time, and He said, “Remember Lot’s wife.”

It is an astonishing thing that the few things in the Bible that God calls upon us to “Remember” are the very things that mankind tends to forget. For instance, the fourth commandment begins with the word “Remember,” yet most of the world today believe this commandment was done away with at the cross, or that the seventh-day Sabbath was just for the Jews, or that it doesn’t really matter what day is kept as the Sabbath, just so long as I worship God on one day.

But God said to remember Lot’s wife, so we should go back to the Old Testament and look at the Biblical account of Lot and the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah to learn why He said it.

Haran, Lot’s father, died, leaving Lot fatherless. Abraham, his uncle, assumed the role of father to him, and when Abraham left Ur of the Chaldees and ultimately went to the promised land, Lot was with him.

Early in Lot’s life, he made a choice that proved to be a very serious mistake. Many people make some of the most serious mistakes of their lives when they are young, and the consequences can follow them throughout their life. However, Lot’s mistake didn’t just affect his own life, it also changed the course of world history.

“The wife of Lot was a selfish, irreligious woman, and her influence was exerted to separate her husband from Abraham. But for her, Lot would not have remained in Sodom, deprived of the counsel of the wise, God-fearing patriarch. The influence of his wife and the associations of that wicked city would have led him to apostatize from God had it not been for the faithful instruction he had early received from Abraham. The marriage of Lot and his choice of Sodom for a home were the first links in a chain of events fraught with evil to the world for many generations.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 174

Lot made a poor choice of a marriage partner, but if he had asked the following three questions, he might never have married her.

  1. Is the man or woman I’m planning to marry a proud person?

Marriage to a proud person is a guarantee that you will have trouble in your marriage. Study the book of Proverbs.

  1. Is the man or woman I’m planning to marry a selfish person?

Mrs. White says that Lot’s wife was a selfish woman. No man or woman should ever consider marriage to a person who gives clear evidence of a selfish character. Such an act guarantees sadness in your life, for only an unselfish person can bring happiness to a marriage partner.

  1. Is the man or woman I’m planning to marry an irreligious person?

Mrs. White says that Lot’s wife was not only selfish but also irreligious. This is how the Bible describes an irreligious person:

“If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle their tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless.” James 1:26

Mrs. White has this to say about the quarrelsome faultfinder: “I feel an intense interest regarding every faultfinder; for I know that a quarrelsome disposition will never find entrance into the city of God. Quarrel with yourself, but with no one else; and then be converted.” Manuscript Releases, Vol. 7, 271

Just imagine being married to someone who cannot control their tongue!

“No one who fears God can without danger connect himself with one who fears Him not. ‘Can two walk together, except they be agreed?’ Amos 3:3.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 174

The marriage of Christians with the ungodly is forbidden in the Bible. The Lord’s direction is, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14

Lot made a poor choice and married a proud, selfish, and irreligious woman, but he could not leave her, so he remained faithful to her. (See 1 Corinthians 7.)

Abraham and Lot had large herds of cattle between them, and soon, the Bible tells us, strife rose up. This strife was between Lot’s herdsmen and Abraham’s herdsmen over the pasture land and watering places for the cattle.

“Contention among God’s people is offensive in His sight.” The Signs of the Times, August 19, 1880

“Charity does not rejoice in evil, revenge does. … Avoid every bitter word, every unkind action. Love as brethren; be kind; be courteous. Do not scandalize the truth by bitter envying and contention for such is the spirit of the world.” Ibid., February 14, 1895

It became apparent that a solution must be found. Having a great deal of land, Abraham pointed out that there was no need for fighting, and offered to Lot the ability to choose where he would like to set up his home. Lot chose the good pasture land with plenty of water that lay closest to Sodom. But was this the only choice Lot could have made, the one the Lord would have wanted for him? I’m sure it wasn’t.

Sadly, pride held sway in Lot’s side of the camp, and he was pleased with the obvious benefits of the land. Sodom was a prosperous city, and living near it helped Lot to continue to prosper. It also pleased Lot’s wife.

Abraham, as Lot’s senior, and, acting as his father, could have disallowed Lot from taking that part of the land. Abraham had every right to make the first choice, and whatever was left would have been Lot’s. Mrs. White distinctly says that Abraham was responsible for Lot’s financial success and prosperity. But Abraham was a gracious person, and even though by right he could have made the first choice, he told Lot, “Please let there be no strife between you and me, and between my herdsmen and your herdsmen; for we are brethren.” Genesis 13:8. Instead, he gave Lot the first choice, and because he and his wife were proud and selfish, Lot looked around, saw how fine the plain of Jordan was and chose Sodom.

“Abram dwelt in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelt in the cities of the plain and pitched his tent toward Sodom.” Verse 12

It appears that Lot didn’t at first live in Sodom, but he was very close by and it wasn’t long before he moved his family right into the city. The Bible doesn’t tell us how many children Lot had, though we know he had at least four daughters, but there is no record that he had any sons.

Sodom was filled with wealthy, corrupt, and sexually-perverse people. Homosexuality was an accepted practice with the inhabitants of the city, but as far as we know, none of Lot’s family was involved in those practices.

Homosexuality is not our subject here. However, we need to understand that we can be as guilty as those of Sodom—become like the Sodomite—if we involve ourselves in sexual activities that are contrary to the guidance of the Bible and Inspiration.

Do not Submit Your Body

“Any youth who would submit her body to be handled by a man is in no way fit for the kingdom of heaven. All this vile practice and commonness is what is ruining our youth. …

“These are the very sins which corrupted Sodom. Their evil practices did not come all at once. First one man and woman stupefied themselves by unholy polluted habits. Then as the inhabitants settled in Sodom … [and] continued to multiply, these ministers of sin continued in educating them in their own defiling practices … until Sodom became renowned for its pollutions. ” Testimonies on Sexual Behavior, Adultery, and Divorce, 125, 126

We must be vigilant that we do not allow ourselves, particularly the young, to participate in this sodomitish practice of petting and handling one another outside the bonds of marriage, else we cannot enter heaven.

Forsake Uncleanness

Reading again from the Spirit of Prophecy: “Not one particle of sodomitish impurity will escape the wrath of God at the execution of the judgment. Those who do not repent of and forsake all uncleanness will fall with the wicked. …

“Handbills on which indecent pictures are printed are posted up along our streets to allure our eyes and deprave the morals. These presentations are of such a character as to stir up the basest passions of the human heart through corrupt imaginings. These corrupt imaginings are followed by defiling practices like those in which the Sodomites indulged. … Our youth will be defiled, their thoughts degraded, and their souls polluted unless they are barricaded with the truth.” Ibid., 119, 120

Sodom was filled with portrayals of indecent and corrupting activities; and it continues today on billboards, lighted displays, in posters, magazines, movies, and TV shows.

A Stylish Appearance

“Far greater pains should be taken to instruct them so that they shall have beautiful characters and keep the way of the Lord than to have them make a stylish appearance, taking the way of the Sodomites.” Pamphlet 096 – Testimonies on the Case of Elder E. P. Daniels (1890), 16

So what is wrong with a stylish appearance? Too much of what makes up a stylish appearance is designed—intentionally—to awaken sensuality and sexual passions, and if we wear any kind of garment or adornment that arouses sexual passions, we are following the way of the Sodomites.

By Withholding, You are Holier

In the first centuries following Christ’s ascension, the devil introduced the practice of celibacy among the clergy. This practice put forth that if you were celibate, then you were more holy than married people. The practice of celibacy continues within the Catholic church even today. (See History of Sacerdotal Celibacy in the Christian Church by Henry Charles Lea.)

We can never fully imagine how much homosexuality, fornication, adultery, and all other kinds of lewd practices have resulted in the world as a result of this teaching.

Growing up in Sodom

“I have had a sharp pointed testimony for the youth, and I am pained to the heart to see the little modesty and real, good, decent behavior in the young. [There are] young girls so forward as to make advances to young men; so destitute of Christlike humility and elevation of character. The young girls [are] flirting with young men, sitting in meeting and exchanging notes with them at the very time I am presenting a message from God to the people.

“The young women make advances to the young men and get up a flirtation with them. Their forwardness, their common, cheap talk and ways, are offensive to God, and I told them last Sabbath that they were fast becoming like the Sodomites.” Manuscript Releases, Vol. 19, 218, 219

Sodom was a place where the young people were flirtatious with each other and spoke common, cheap words.

“Their young men and women think only of how they can get into each other’s society and break down all the barriers of reserve and true decorum. It is a pitiful condition of things. …

“Boys flirting with the girls, and the girls flirting with the boys, seems to be a passion which destroys common sense … and leaves the souls of youth, who might use their talents to the glory of God, as destitute of the Spirit of God as the hills of Gilboa … .

“Unless the moral taste is refined, unless Christ becomes an abiding principle in the soul, but few of the youth will ever see heaven.” Ibid., 219, 220

It is a dangerous thing to grow up in Sodom. Only three people escaped the destruction of Sodom alive; only a few people from the large cities of the world today will escape their Sodom-like influence. We must get out of Sodom. It would be best to physically remove ourselves from Sodom’s influence. It may not be possible at this time, but definitely we must turn our backs from its lifestyle and wicked influences.

“Lot could have preserved his family from many evils had he not made his home in the wicked, polluted city. All that Lot and his family did in Sodom could have been done by them even if they had lived in a place some distance from the city.” Last Day Events, 96

“Enoch walked with God, and yet he did not live in the midst of any city polluted with any kind of violence and wickedness, as did Lot in Sodom.

“He [Enoch] did not make his abode with the wicked.” Maranatha, 184

“Cities and even country towns are becoming like Sodom and Gomorrah, and like the world as it was in the days of Noah. The training of the youth in those days was after the same order as the children are being educated and trained in this age, to love excitement, to glorify themselves, to follow the imagination of their own evil hearts.” Manuscript Releases, Vol. 12, 89

“Those who will take their families into the country place them where they have fewer temptations.” The Adventist Home, 143

Leaving Sodom and moving to the country, if you can, is a good idea. But physically leaving a place doesn’t remove it or its attractions from the mind and heart. It isn’t enough to take your body out of Sodom, you have to remove Sodom from your mind and heart as well; and there’s the rub.

With so much electronic media that can reach even isolated places out in the country, you don’t have to be in Sodom to continue enjoying all its pleasures via radio, television, or the Internet. But if it is your desire to truly be free of Sodom, in every way, then you have some work to do, because if you want to get out of Sodom, you must first get Sodom out of your mind.

There is a principle found in God’s law regarding how we relate to our parents. In the fifth commandment, the Lord said, and of course this would apply to children of any age, that we should honor our father and mother.

One of the greatest problems for Sodom was that they had lost all concept of the principle of honor. They had no respect for themselves nor anyone else. If they wanted something, they took it, even if they had no right to it. But the principle of honor is part of the ten commandments. We dishonor God and our fellow man when we fail to obey these commandments. And if we want to be truly rid of Sodom in our minds and hearts, then we must sacrifice everything to honor and obey God’s law, seeking always to do His will, and to honor the lives of all around us. If not, we will never be a part of the kingdom of heaven.

Out of Time

Looking at the last night for Sodom, we see that angels came to town, and Lot being very hospitable, invited them to his home. There he prepared a meal, but before they could retire for the night, the men of the city gathered around the house demanding that Lot should, “Bring them [the angels] out to us that we may know them carnally (have sexual relations with them).” Genesis 19:5

What was Lot’s response? He offered his two virgin daughters to these men in an attempt to keep them from committing homosexual acts with his guests. He obviously was under a lot of pressure, afraid no doubt, that he and everyone in the house might be killed.

Lot thought he was just entertaining two men who had journeyed to Sodom, but he soon discovered that his guests were far from ordinary men. The angels, in response to the demands of the men of Sodom, struck them with blindness. The Bible tells us that the men then wandered around outside unable to find the door until they became weary from the effort.

The angels then told Lot their purpose for visiting Sodom. “For we will destroy this place, because the outcry against them has grown great before the face of the Lord, and the Lord has sent us to destroy it.” Verse 13

Lot went to warn his daughters and their husbands telling them of the mission of the angels and the soon-coming destruction of Sodom. They laughed and called him insane. “Lot returned sorrowfully to his home … .” The Truth About Angels, 76. The angels instructed Lot, his wife, and remaining two daughters to leave Sodom. But Lot hesitated. “Stupified with sorrow, he lingered, loath to depart. But for the angels of God, they would all have perished in the ruin of Sodom. The heavenly messengers took him and his wife and daughters by the hand, and led them out of the city.” Patriarchs and Prophets, 160

Why did Lot delay? We could say because he didn’t want to leave his children who did not want to leave Sodom, and that would be true. But a whole lot of what made Lot who he was at that moment was there in Sodom. He was influential and wealthy. His wife and children were happy there. Lot didn’t just live in Sodom, Sodom lived in him, and a decision to leave meant having to leave Sodom behind in every way. He would have to give up everything, and he would be asking his wife and children to do the same.

The angels had to take Lot and his family from the city by force and, once outside the city, they left them to return to their work of destruction, instructing Lot and his family to flee to the mountains and not to look back. But Lot pleaded that they could go instead to one of the small towns nearby. He had lived in the city for so long he was afraid to be in the mountains, afraid of wild beasts and snakes, and likely, the inhospitable aspect of living in the wild.

Because Lot hesitated and was reluctant to follow the angels’ instructions quickly and to the letter, it cost his wife her life. Because he lingered and was afraid, his wife manifested unbelief and she disobeyed a direct, divine command from the Lord Himself. She looked back toward Sodom; and immediately she became a pillar of salt.

Friend, we are living in a world that has become a second Sodom. Will you get out alive? Will your spouse and children get out alive? The decisions that you make now, each and every day, will determine if you will. It is not enough to get your body out of Sodom; you have to get Sodom out of your mind and heart.

The Great Controversy tells us that when God delivers His people, they will have given up all for Christ. How much? Everything. From a worldly point of view, all the saints are going to be very poor.

You see, when Jesus comes, this will all be burned up—houses, cars, bank accounts, stocks, bonds, businesses—everything. The only thing that the saints will take from this world to the next is their character; a character free of Sodom, “a character formed according to the divine likeness.” Christ’s Object Lessons, 332

“Lot had too much of a lingering spirit. Let us not be like him. The same voice that warned Lot to leave Sodom bids us, ‘Come out from among them, and be ye separate … and touch not the unclean.’ Those who obey this warning will find a refuge. Let every man be wide awake for himself, and try to save his family. Let him gird himself for the work. God will reveal from point to point what to do next.

“Hear the voice of God through the apostle Paul, ‘Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God that worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.’ Lot trod the plain with unwilling and tardy steps. He had so long associated with evil workers that he could not see his peril until his wife stood on the plain a pillar of salt forever.” Country Living, 6, 7

Remember Lot’s wife.

Pastor John J. Grosboll is Director of Steps to Life and pastors the Prairie Meadows Church in Wichita, Kansas. He may be contacted by email at: historic@stepstolife.org, or by telephone at: 316-788-5559.

Health – Sabbath Activities

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The object of the Sabbath was that all mankind might be benefited. Man was not made to fit the Sabbath; for the Sabbath was made after the creation of man, to meet his necessities. … He [God] set apart that special day for man to rest from his labor, that, as he should look upon the earth beneath and the heavens above, he might reflect that God made all these in six days and rested upon the seventh; and that, as he should behold the tangible proofs of God’s infinite wisdom, his heart might be filled with love and reverence for his Maker.” Testimonies, Vol. 2, 582

Have you wondered what you can do with your children on Sabbath afternoon, activities that follow Bible and Spirit of Prophecy counsel?

When I was a child, my mother would play Sabbath Bible games with me, we read together the Little Friend I brought home from Sabbath School, and we played piano duets. At the close of Sabbath, we would kneel together and thank the Lord for His Sabbath day and the blessings He had given us during its hours.

Child Guidance suggests reading to and with your children or creating a home reading circle where the family can come together and every member shares in the reading of a spiritual story or Bible study.

Acts of service such as visiting the sick, shut-ins, and those in care facilities, bringing food, flowers, smiles, and songs give children and youth the opportunity to do what Jesus did in His personal ministry.

“The pleasure of doing good to others imparts a glow to the feelings which flashes through the nerves, quickens the circulation of the blood, and induces mental and physical health.” My Life Today, 246

Next to the Bible, nature is to be our great lesson book. It is full of the knowledge of God, teeming with divine instruction. It has a voice that sings of the majesty and love of God. On every leaf and stone, in the earth, sea, and sky God’s name is written. The glory of God can be seen in every flower and tree, and every living creature. And though marred by sin, the earth and all that lives on it and dwells in it, still rings with a beauty that man can hardly fathom.

Children should be encouraged to search out in nature the objects that illustrate Bible teachings. Nature walks are a good way to commune with God, and spend time in the sunshine and fresh air.

The following table lists suggestions that can be used as clues for a Sabbath scavenger hunt during a nature walk or as a Bible game around the table at home.

“Oh, there is health and peace in doing the will of our Heavenly Father. …

“Pure and undefiled religion is not a sentiment, but the doing of works of mercy and love. This religion is necessary to health and happiness. It enters the polluted soul temple, and with a scourge drives out the sinful intruders. Taking the throne, it consecrates all by its presence, illuminating the heart. … It opens the windows of the soul heavenward, letting in the sunshine of God’s love. With it comes serenity and composure. Physical, mental, and moral strength increase, because the atmosphere of heaven, as a living, active agency, fills the soul.” My Life Today, 246

“Our heavenly Father desires through the observance of the Sabbath to preserve among men a knowledge of Himself. He desires that the Sabbath shall direct our minds to Him as the true and living God, and that through knowing Him we may have life and peace.” Testimonies, Vol. 6, 349

“And it shall come to pass that from one new moon to another, and from one Sabbath to another, all flesh shall come to worship before Me.” Isaiah 66:23

 

1 These clap their hands. Isaiah 55:12
2 What does the Bible say about this flower? Luke 12:27
3 This fades, but the word of God does not. Isaiah 40:8
4 Even the smallest seed can grow and become what? Matthew 13:32
5 These shall break forth with song. Isaiah 55:12
6 This passes and is gone. Psalm 103:16
7 These do not sow or reap, but the Father still feeds them. Matthew 6:26
8 Evildoers shall be cut down like what? Psalm 37:2
9 Jesus gave His life for His what? John 10:11
10 God has what upon a thousand hills? Psalm 50:10
11 False prophets are described as wearing sheep’s clothing, but what are they really? Matthew 7:15
12 If we look up, what do we see? Job 35:5
13 This rises and sets every day. Ecclesiastes 1:5
14 This falls on both righteous and the unrighteous. Matthew 5:45
15 Jesus knows the number of stars that we see in the night sky (Psalm 147:4); and He knows what else? Matthew 10:30
16 Jonah was swallowed by and was three days in the belly of a great what? Jonah 1:17
17 Jesus performed a great miracle with five loaves and what else? Matthew 14:17
18 Jesus says that if we will follow Him, He will make us what? Matthew 4:19
19 Those who hope in the Lord will soar like what? Isaiah 40:31
20 If God cares so much for all His creations and creatures in nature, how much does the Bible say He cares for us? John 3:16

 

Give Up Everything that Weighs You Down

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Let’s talk habits. Do you know someone who has a bad habit? Do you have one? Or let’s ask the question in a different way: Do you know anyone who doesn’t have a bad habit? This subject has a universal application to both adults and children. Most of our bad habits are developed in early childhood and continue to affect us throughout the rest of our lives.

Perhaps there comes a time in people’s lives, after earnest evaluation, when they realize they don’t want to keep a particular bad habit. They want to make a change but find that they are locked into that habit because habits are very difficult to change.

Here’s a simple example: What would happen if I were to climb to the very top of the roof of a building and then jump off? Someone might say, “Well, if you prayed hard enough, maybe you wouldn’t get hurt too bad.” Is that a reasonable expectation?

We do this all the time. We violate certain physical or spiritual laws and then expect the Lord to deliver us from the resulting pain and suffering. But God cannot answer this prayer, because He would be condoning the violation of the very laws that He has established. So, when we study about how to deal with bad habits, and study the laws that are involved, then we can know how to escape them.

And, friends, there is an escape. God sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into this world because we were in bondage to something that we could not free ourselves from, and Jesus said, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, … He has sent Me … to proclaim liberty to the captives and … to set at liberty those who are oppressed.” Luke 4:18

This is, in part, liberty and freedom from our guilt. But it is also liberty and freedom from our bad habits. Jesus came to set you free from your bad habits.

Spiritual, mental, and physical components are all involved in this escape, and in the forming, maintaining, and deliverance from them or we’ll never be free from them.

Let’s start with the spiritual and mental components and then we’ll take up the physical component.

Just how did we develop bad habits when we were children?

Children develop bad habits because their minds are not trained. As children grow up in their parental home, parents are to cultivate, train, and develop the good habits a child should have to lead a healthy, spiritual life.

Children should not be idle. A busy child has no spare time to engage in bad habits. Children without anything to do spend more time getting into trouble, and bad habits are the results. This has been a great curse in society.

Children need to have a balance of physical and mental activity. Parents must consider if their children are occupied enough to keep them busy all day.

Inappropriate associations can also result in bad habits. Who are your children’s friends? Do they love and obey their parents? Do they love and keep the ten commandments? Associates who are immoral or idle will encourage the development of bad habits in your children.

“With the present plan of education the door of temptation is open to youth. Although they generally have too many hours of study, they have many hours without anything to do. These leisure hours are frequently spent in a reckless manner. The knowledge of bad habits is communicated from one to another and vice is greatly increased.” Testimonies, Vol. 3, 148

Parents need to be aware of who their children go to school with and with whom they spend a lot of time. As parents, we need to place our children in God’s hands, asking Him to tell us where we should send our children to school and to protect them from the things that they will learn, see, and hear that could have a negative effect on their future.

Neglect also facilitates the development of children’s bad habits. When parents are so busy that they really don’t have time to raise their children, then the children are left to fend for themselves, and bad habits are sure to be the result.

Our home life should be one of order. There should be a schedule that tells children when to get up and when to go to bed, when to eat, when to do home chores and school work, and when to play.

So, these are three ways that children develop bad habits. What about those of us who now are adults with bad habits that we can’t seem to do anything about? The Bible clearly states the condition we are in.

“Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard its spots? Then may you also do good who are accustomed to doing evil.” Jeremiah 13:23

“And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. … But no man can tame the tongue, it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.” James 3:6, first part, 8

How many people can change the color of their skin? None. Can the leopard change its spots? No. Who can tame the tongue? No one. The Bible is saying that we have a habit, and though we do not want to keep this habit any longer, we are finding it impossible to change.

The first thing we must understand about firmly-ingrained habits is that there is no one who can break or change them. This is one of the reasons people become so discouraged when they try to “kick” their habits, or make resolutions that they don’t keep.

Someone might think that if it’s an impossibility for a man to break his bad habits, then why are we even talking about it?

We want to talk about it because what we need to know most of all is that there is a way, a miraculous power, that will aid us in overcoming our bad habits. That way is Jesus. Changing anything in our lives just won’t happen without Divine help. It is only after He comes into our lives that we can then be set free from the things that hold us captive.

“When the soul surrenders itself to Christ, a new power takes possession of the new heart. A change is wrought which man can never accomplish for himself. It is a supernatural work, bringing a supernatural element into human nature. The soul that is yielded to Christ becomes His own fortress, which He holds in a revolted world, and He intends that no authority shall be known in it but His own. A soul thus kept in possession by the heavenly agencies is impregnable to the assaults of Satan. But unless we do yield ourselves to the control of Christ, we shall be dominated by the wicked one. We must inevitably be under the control of the one or the other of the two great powers that are contending for the supremacy of the world. It is not necessary for us deliberately to choose the service of the kingdom of darkness in order to come under its dominion. We have only to neglect to ally ourselves with the kingdom of light. If we do not cooperate with the heavenly agencies, Satan will take possession of the heart, and will make it his abiding place. The only defense against evil is the indwelling of Christ in the heart through faith in His righteousness.” The Desire of Ages, 324

What is the only defense against evil? The indwelling of Christ in the heart. How do we receive the indwelling of Christ in our hearts? By yielding ourselves completely to Him.

“Unless we become vitally connected with God, we can never resist the unhallowed effects of self-love, self-indulgence, and temptation to sin. We may leave off many bad habits, for the time we may part company with Satan; but without a vital connection with God, through the surrender of ourselves to Him moment by moment, we shall be overcome. Without a personal acquaintance with Christ, and a continual communion, we are at the mercy of the enemy, and shall do his bidding in the end.” Ibid.

Without this vital connection with Jesus, unless He is dwelling in the heart by faith, we will be under the control of the devil, and even if we leave off many of our bad habits, he will still be our master.

A union with the Divine still requires supreme human effort.

“Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.” Philippians 2:12

There are two mistakes that most people make. Some want to do it all themselves until they find out it’s impossible to do alone. Or others, realizing it is impossible, decide to just depend on the Lord and let Him do it all. They don’t even try.

God is going to do a miraculous work in each of us, but we have a work of our own to do in this partnership with Him. We see that in Philippians 2:12. But verse 13 makes it clearer just what God intends to do in our lives.

“For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.” I wish we had a stronger English word for “to do.” In Greek, this means to energize or to empower. You could read it like this: “… works in you to will and to empower [you] for His good pleasure.” God wants to give you the power to overcome your bad habits, and then with that power at your disposal, you do your part of the work with fear and trembling. To overcome the wickedness in our lives, it takes two: our complete surrender and God’s miraculous power.

“To this end I also labor, striving according to His working which works in me mightily.” Colossians 1:29

The Greek word Paul uses that we translate as striving, agonizomai, means to fight or to contend or to struggle. It is the word from which we get the English word agonize. This is an all-in struggle. Then the words “works in” mean, just like in Philippians 2:13, energizes or empowers.

We can struggle, fight, agonize over our bad habits. We can desperately labor and strive for our entire life to be free from them, but unless we cooperate with God so that He can work with great power a change in our hearts, we will fail.

I am reminded of the somewhat famous quote by Mark Twain regarding his smoking habit, “Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.”

God doesn’t want me to give up a habit only to repeatedly pick it back up again, never truly gaining the victory over it. He wants to give me the power to be completely and fully done with it. Only then will it never have control over my life again.

Moving to the physical effects of our bad habits, Mrs. White writes:

“Any habit or practice which will weaken the nerve and brain power or the physical strength disqualifies for the exercise of the next grace which comes in after temperance—patience.” Our High Calling, 69

“For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and He ponders all his paths. His own iniquities entrap the wicked man, and he is caught in the cords of his sin. … He shall die for lack of instruction, and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.” Proverbs 5:21–23

This text shows us how a person becomes bound up with his bad habits and can’t get loose. He may pray and pray, but simply cannot get free of them. He begins to think that there is something wrong with Christianity, but the truth is, it’s not the religion at all, rather he is violating certain physical laws that make it impossible for him to overcome his bad habits.

In order to overcome, we must first have willpower. The prefrontal cortex of the brain, right behind the forehead, is responsible for our “I will, I won’t, and I want powers.” A more medical explanation of the responsibilities of this area of the brain is that our abstract thinking, thought analysis, and keeping our behavior in check all occur here. The left side of the prefrontal cortex handles the “I will” power, which helps us start and stick to things that aren’t so much fun or are stressful. The right side handles the “I won’t” power, which keeps us from acting on every impulse or craving that we have. And the center, lower area is responsible for the “I want” power, which helps us keep track of our goals and desires.

There are two facets of willpower: yes and no. Exercising our willpower isn’t always about saying no. It is just as important to use our willpower to say yes for the right things as it is to say no to the bad things.

Source: positivepsychology.com/psychology-of-willpower

Now let’s consider morality. Do you know what part of the brain is responsible for our morality? We’ll call it our conscience. The prefrontal cortex. Morality is the ability to determine right from wrong.

Spirituality is also located in the prefrontal cortex. It is from here that you talk to God and ask Him to help you.

But what if something has impaired your willpower and skewed your ability to make right decisions? Medical research shows us that when a person’s frontal lobe is damaged, he or she can completely change. A very religious person might no longer have an interest in church, religion, or the Bible at all. A person who was very conscientious and always doing what was right might begin to engage in very questionable behavior. But what if there was nothing wrong with the frontal lobe? Could our diet, a lack of sleep, fresh air, water, or appropriate exercise impair our ability to make sound decisions? Or what if we clouded our brains with alcohol, drugs, sugar, and other harmful substances? Anything that impairs the function of the frontal lobe will make it difficult to exercise our willpower to overcome any bad habit.

The reason people today are having so much trouble overcoming bad habits, much more so than they had 100 years ago, is because we are violating certain physical laws that are impairing the function of our frontal lobe.

Let’s look at some of the things that can impair your ability to exercise your willpower.

Drug use—illicit drugs, many prescription drugs, and social drugs. Social drugs include caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol.

Introducing these substances into your body is like shooting yourself in the foot if you are trying to overcome a bad habit. They numb the frontal lobe and interfere with your ability to utilize your willpower.

Diet—is vitally important. Refined sugar must be eliminated and foods containing unrefined carbohydrates—starchy foods like whole grains and potatoes—should be included. Animal foods contain arachidonic acid which has been proven to harm the frontal lobe.

Mrs. White writes: “A meat diet changes the disposition and strengthens the animalism. We are composed of what we eat, and eating much flesh will diminish intellectual activity. Students would accomplish much more in their studies if they never tasted meat. When the animal part of the human agent is strengthened by meat eating, the intellectual powers diminish proportionately.” Counsels on Diet and Foods, 389

Medical research has shown that the brain functions better when dietary calories and the amount of food consumed are restricted.

If your diet consists of things that are not good for the health of the body, particularly the frontal lobe of your brain, then how will that affect your ability to overcome a bad habit?

Hypnosis—does not allow you to overcome anything. A person cannot overcome any bad habit using hypnosis because it bypasses the frontal lobe and utilizes other areas of the brain, placing them under the control of someone or something else. People who are in a hypnotic-like state are not in control of their own willpower.

There are two things that are done in this world, including in the church, that make it impossible for us to overcome our bad habits: watching television and movies and listening to rock music. There is significant medical data to support that both of these activities produce a hypnotic-like state. It is not a state of complete hypnosis because you are able to communicate and participate, but your brain is overwhelmed by the images and sounds that you see and hear.

All these things make it impossible for you to overcome your bad habits. They violate certain physical and spiritual laws that God has put in place, and He cannot help you overcome your bad habits if you choose to keep them in your life.

However, if you choose to lay all these things aside and come to the Lord for the power He is waiting to give you to overcome your bad habits, He will do it. There is no other way for you to succeed.

Somebody might think that it simply takes too much effort to give up bad habits. But if you are looking to follow Jesus, longing to one day join the saints in heaven for eternity, then you cannot hold onto these worldly things. Listen to what Jesus says: “So likewise, whoever of you does not forsake all that he has cannot be My disciple.” Luke 14:33

Friends, are there things in your life that hinder you from overcoming your bad habits? Are you willing to remove everything from your life that stands between you and God? It’s a sacrifice, I know, but it is the price of eternal life.

Claim His promise of power, cooperate, struggle, contend, and you can overcome all your bad habits by His grace and power.

Pastor John J. Grosboll is Director of Steps to Life and pastors the Prairie Meadows Church in Wichita, Kansas. He may be contacted by email at: historic@stepstolife.org, or by telephone at: 316-788-5559.

What God Has Joined Together

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“So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Matthew 19:6

What God puts together, man is not to divide. There are some things that belong together because God has put them together.

We are in a world and generation where everything that God has put together the devil is trying to tear apart. He aims at the home, the church, anything that God has joined together. He says separate, and he has a million imps at work to segregate, fragment, decimate, and cause disunion and anarchy—that is his program. “What God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Let’s look at some things that God has put together. “Lord, You have been favorable to Your land; You have brought back the captivity of Jacob. You have forgiven the iniquity of Your people; You have covered all their sin. You have taken away all Your wrath; You have turned from the fierceness of Your anger.

“Restore us, O God of our salvation, and cause Your anger toward us to cease. Will You be angry with us forever? Will You prolong Your anger to all generations? Will You not revive us again, that Your people may rejoice in You? Show us Your mercy, Lord, and grant us Your salvation.

“I will hear what God the Lord will speak, for He will speak peace to His people and to His saints; but let them not turn back to folly. Surely His salvation is near to those who fear Him, that glory may dwell in our land.

“Mercy and truth have met together; righteousness and peace have kissed. Truth shall spring out of the earth, and righteousness shall look down from heaven. Yes, the Lord will give what is good; and our land will yield its increase. Righteousness will go before Him, and shall make His footsteps our pathway.” Psalm 85:1–13

Notice the two great traits or attributes that are said to meet together. In a beautiful repetition of Hebrew poetry the thought is emphasized. Mercy and truth have met together. Righteousness and peace have kissed each other. Another of the translations puts it this way: “Loving kindness and truth have met together.” Love and truth, in other words, are joined together in God’s program. The New English Bible translates it: “Love and fidelity have come together. Justice and peace join hands.” Another translation: “Love and loyalty now meet. Righteousness and peace now embrace.”

But why the emphasis on the meeting of these two great attributes? Because the devil has been trying for 6,000 years to separate them. We may call them justice and mercy. We may call them truth and love. One emphasizes a strict hew to the character of God; the other emphasizes His mercy and forgiving kindness. The devil is trying to separate them, but what God has joined together, let not man separate.

No one truly understands one side of the character of God on this matter unless he understands the other side. The two are not disassociated, they are not antagonistic. Each one is a reflection of the other. Mercy and truth meet together. Righteousness and peace have kissed and embraced each other. This was wonderfully and gloriously demonstrated at the cross. At the cross justice and mercy, love and truth met and embraced, the complete manifestation of the character of God.

A most vivid and sublime presentation of this meeting is found in Selected Messages, Book 1, 349: “The grace of Christ and the law of God are inseparable.” Inseparable means you cannot separate them. The devil says, “I’ll try, just watch me.” But God says, “You cannot do it.” There are many things passing for the gospel today that separate these two attributes and when you separate them, you really have neither one when you get through. “In Jesus mercy and truth are met together, righteousness and peace have kissed each other. In His life and character He not only reveals the character of God, but the possibility of man. He was the representative of God and the exemplar of humanity. He presented to the world what humanity might become when united by faith with divinity.” Ibid.

Jesus was not only a substitute, He was a demonstration of what, by the grace of God, can be wrought out in the life of man.

“The only-begotten Son of God took upon Him the nature of man, and established His cross between earth and heaven. Through the cross, man was drawn to God, and God to man.” Ibid.

Here we see the sublime representation of what happened at the cross. Man was drawn to God, and God to man through the cross. Are you drawn to God through the cross? Did God love man more because of the cross? No. At the cross God saw a way, He demonstrated and revealed a way. God, representing justice upon the throne of the universe, saw a way that man could be pardoned without, in any way, weakening the structure and justice of the universe. He saw how man could be forgiven without setting the law aside. He saw how He could bend toward the repenting sinner without accepting or condoning the sin.

“Through the cross, man was drawn to God, and God to man. Justice moved from its high and awful position, and the heavenly hosts, the armies of holiness, drew near to the cross, bowing with reverence; for at the cross justice was satisfied.” Ibid.

Christ on the cross bore everything that justice required and tasted death for every man. He paid the debt. O I am so thankful for that love!

In The Desire of Ages, 762, these wonderful thoughts again are beautifully expressed: “God’s love has been expressed in His justice no less than in His mercy.” We think of the mercy of God as revealing His love. That mercy is infinite mercy. “Grace,” as we sing the song, “that is greater than all our sin.” An infinite love revealed in an infinite mercy. But this says that God’s love has been expressed in His justice no less than in His mercy. Justice is just as much an expression of God’s love as is His mercy. If we don’t agree with that, we either need a different view of justice or we need a different view of mercy. If we correctly understand God, we will see His love in His justice as well as in His mercy, and justice is the foundation of His throne and the fruit of His love.

The world is suffering today because of a permissive attitude toward lawbreaking. Criminals are roaming throughout the world, making life unsafe in both country and city. Why? There is a small chance that a criminal will be caught, a small chance that he will ever be convicted, and an equally small chance that if he is convicted that he will suffer the penalty to the nth degree. The law of averages is all on the side of the criminal and lawbreaking. Man has become so soft, so permissive, that the criminal, high-handed rebel that he is defies the law. The justice of God recognizes that the law must be enforced, wrapping up the peace and order of the entire universe.

What shall we say then of a so-called gospel, that would present the obedience of Christ as something which is a substitute for man’s obedience? It suggests that Christ died for man’s sin, and then man goes free to continue in transgression, yet he is saved because of the sacrifice of Christ. My friend, that is not the gospel.

The gospel of Jesus Christ is the power of God unto salvation from sin, to everyone who believes. In the gospel of Jesus Christ, God’s love is revealed “in His justice no less than in His mercy. Justice is the foundation of His throne, and the fruit of His love. It had been Satan’s purpose to divorce mercy from truth and justice. He sought to prove that the righteousness of God’s law is an enemy to peace. But Christ shows that in God’s plan they are indissolubly joined together; the one cannot exist without the other.” Ibid. There would be no real, lasting, worthwhile, effective mercy in this universe if God’s justice could be set aside and destroyed. Equally so there would be no real justice if God’s mercy could be destroyed. Mercy and justice cannot exist without one another.

When the bride and groom are joined in the wedding service, sometimes they not only join hands but they embrace. There’s a kiss of love and this is the picture here. There is no war between justice, mercy, and the character of God. They are joined, indissolubly joined together. And what God has joined together, let not man separate.

This must be true in our experience:

Truth is knowing God’s will.

Righteousness is doing God’s will.

Faith is man’s response, believing the truth and doing the righteousness; both are made possible through the gift of Christ. He is the truth (John 14:6). He has given man the gift of faith. Faith is one of the gifts of the Spirit. He has given man the gift of righteousness, righteousness that covers every transgression that’s passed to the penitent, righteousness which not only covers him but enters his very mind and soul that the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us.

“Walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.” Romans 8:1 KJV. This righteousness, truth, justice, and revelation of the will of God, knowing and doing it does not replace love. Love is not a substitute for righteousness, neither is faith a substitute for righteousness. Faith is man’s response to God’s truth and love is an expression of man’s response to God’s love manifested in obedience.

Galatians 5:5, 6 tell us: “For we through the Spirit eagerly wait for the hope of righteousness by faith. For in Jesus Christ neither circumcision nor uncircumcision avails anything, but faith working through love.” What avails? Faith which works through love. Faith is meant to work.

Do you know what people usually do when they purchase something, only to find that it doesn’t work? Send it back. James makes a very strong stand. He says that if your works aren’t the product of faith, then they are dead. Paul is right in harmony.

Working without either faith or love is legalism. The people of the world see those who strive to keep the commandments of God and the faith of Jesus and call them legalists. But they don’t really understand what legalism is. Legalism is attempting to do right without God, trying to be righteous without the forgiving and sanctifying grace of Jesus Christ. It is trying to keep the law without the indwelling Spirit and the sprinkling of the blood. Trying to obey God alone, is impossible to do, but with God, nothing is impossible. Anything God says to do can be done.

Where the word of the King is there is power. As many as received them gave He power. Peter, writing in his first epistle to the people of God scattered throughout various parts of the world, said, “[E]lect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, in sanctification of the Spirit, for obedience and sprinkling of the blood of Jesus Christ.” 1 Peter 1:2. This was meant to include us, written for our admonition as well. This precious grace is unto obedience; that’s the purpose of it. Paul, in Romans 1:5, reading the margin calls it “the obedience of faith.” Does faith obey? Yes. If it doesn’t obey, it is not faith; it is presumption. Jesus says, “Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.” John 17:17

As I was meditating on these texts, I was thinking about the beautiful rainbow. What color is the rainbow? It’s all colors. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, violet, indigo, merging and blending. All those colors are in every ray of light. In the morning sunlight as those rays of glory stream down, every one of them has all the colors in it. You can’t see it, but it is there. You get a rain shower in the right position with reference to your eye and the sun, and those millions of raindrops act like little prisms breaking up or refracting the light into its various colors. The drops of water don’t add any color; they merely show you what is already there.

At the cross, as the storm and tempest of wrath against sin broke upon the head and heart of Jesus Christ, divine justice and mercy were seen as an expression of the infinite love of God. And now, around the throne forever is that rainbow, representing the union of justice and mercy in the plan of salvation. What God has joined together, let not man separate.

I am afraid of any message attempting to emphasize one at the expense of the other, or any message which seeks to pit one against the other, any message which would hurl epithets against those who would join them together. We need both. White light includes red, blue, yellow, and all the various blends and combinations of all colors. So it is with the character of God, summed up in that one word love, for God is love.

As we view that character and bring it to the prism of Calvary, we see justice and mercy, life and death, glory and shame, forgiveness, justification, sanctification, and righteousness imputed and imparted. As we see all these colors, as it were, of the white light of God’s character, let us not seek to run off with one of those colors and say, “This is it, I’ve got the whole thing.” No, because you don’t have the whole thing. We need every color of the rainbow to make the white light of God’s perfect character.

“Mercy and truth have met together; righteousness and peace have kissed.” Psalm 85:10.

What God has joined together, let not man separate.

Pastor W. D. Frazee studied the Medical Missionary Course at the College of Medical Evangelists in Loma Linda, California. He was called to Utah as a gospel medical evangelist. During the Great Depression, when the church could not afford to hire any assistants, Pastor Frazee began inviting professionals to join him as volunteers. Thus began a faith ministry that would become the foundation for the establishment of the Wildwood Medical Missionary Institute in 1942. He believed that each person is unique, specially designed by the Lord, of infinite value, and has a special place and mission in this world which only he or she can fill. His life followed this principle and encouraged others to do the same.

Editorial – Teaching Courtesy to Children

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Jesus was always an example of true courtesy. He “was never cold and unapproachable. The afflicted often broke in upon His retreat when He needed refreshment and rest, but He had a kind look and an encouraging word for all. He was a pattern of true courtesy.” Testimonies, Vol. 4, 488

Heaven is a place where all the inhabitants are courteous to each other, and now is the time to become courteous as Jesus always was. Ellen White wrote about 150 years ago of the necessity of teaching courtesy to our children.

“No pleasanter sight is there than a family of young folks who are quick to perform little acts of attention toward their elders. … But if mamma never returns a smiling ‘Thank you, dear,’ if papa’s ‘Just what I was wanting, Susie,’ does not indicate that the little attention is appreciated, the children soon drop the habit. … By example, a thousand times more quickly than by precept, can children be taught to speak kindly to each other, to acknowledge favors, to be gentle and unselfish, to be thoughtful and considerate of the comfort of the family.

“Scolding is never allowable; reproof and criticism from parents must have their time and place, but should never intrude so far upon the social life of the family as to render the home uncomfortable. A serious word in private will generally cure a fault more easily than many public criticisms. In some families, a spirit of contradiction and discussion mars the harmony… . It interferes seriously with social freedom when unimportant inaccuracies are watched for, and exposed for the mere sake of exposure. Brothers and sisters also sometimes acquire an almost unconscious habit of teasing each other, half in earnest, half in fun. This is particularly uncomfortable for everybody else, whatever doubtful pleasure the parties themselves may experience.

“In the home where true courtesy prevails, it seems to meet you on the very threshold. You feel the kindly welcome on entering. No rude eyes scan your dress. No angry voices are heard upstairs. No sullen children are sent from the room. No peremptory orders are given to cover the delinquencies of housekeepers or servants. A delightful atmosphere pervades the house—unmistakable, yet indescribable.” The Health Reformer, February 1, 1874

Bible Study – The Christian Family

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May 8 – 14, 2022

Key Text

“That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth; that our daughters may be as pillars, sculptured in palace style.” Psalm 144:12

Study Help: Child Guidance, 318–325, 434–443

Introduction

“The greatest evidence of the power of Christianity that can be presented to the world is a well-ordered, well-disciplined family. This will recommend the truth as nothing else can; for it is a living witness of its practical power upon the heart.” Testimonies, Vol. 4, 304

Sunday

1 A LITTLE HEAVEN ON EARTH

1.a. In order to have a happy home, what does God’s word enjoin upon both husbands and wives? 1 Corinthians 7:3, 4; Ephesians 5:33

 Note: “Do not try to compel each other to do as you wish. You cannot do this and retain each other’s love. Manifestations of self will destroy the peace and happiness of the home. Let not your married life be one of contention. If you do, you will both be unhappy. Be kind in speech and gentle in action, giving up your own wishes. Watch well your words, for they have a powerful influence for good or for ill. Allow no sharpness to come into your voices. Bring into your united life the fragrance of Christlikeness.” Testimonies, Vol. 7, 47

1.b. How does Inspiration describe a true Christian home? Psalm 128; Isaiah 61:9. How can the home be a blessing or a curse?

Note: “We must let Christ into our hearts and homes if we would walk in the light. Home should be made all that the word implies. It should be a little heaven upon earth, a place where the affections are cultivated instead of being studiously repressed. Our happiness depends upon this cultivation of love, sympathy, and true courtesy to one another.” Testimonies, Vol. 3, 539

Monday

2 PARENTS AND CHILDREN

2.a. What do the Scriptures say about the children of God-fearing parents? Psalm 127:3; Proverbs 17:6; Isaiah 54:13

Note: “Let it be remembered that children are not to be treated as though they were our own personal property. Children are the heritage of the Lord, and the plan of redemption includes their salvation as well as ours. They have been entrusted to parents in order that they might be brought up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, that they might be qualified to do their work in time and eternity.” The Adventist Home, 280

“Children are the heritage of the Lord, and unless parents give them such a training as will enable them to keep the way of the Lord, they neglect solemn duty. It is not the will or purpose of God that children shall become coarse, rough, uncourteous, disobedient, unthankful, unholy, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God. The Scriptures state that this condition of society shall be a sign of the last days.” Child Guidance, 229

“They [children] are to be guided in the path of obedience, not indulged in appetite or vanity.” The Adventist Home, 279

2.b. What command does the Lord give to all parents who wish to see their children saved? Deuteronomy 6:4–7; 11:18, 19; Proverbs 22:6

 Note: “Throughout the week let parents remember that their home is to be a school in which their children shall be prepared for the courts above. Let their words be right words. No words which their children should not hear are to escape their lips. Let the spirit be kept free from irritation. Parents, during the week live as in the sight of a holy God, who has given you children to train for Him. Train for Him the little church in your home, that on the Sabbath all may be prepared to worship in the Lord’s sanctuary. Each morning and evening present your children to God as His blood-bought heritage. Teach them that it is their highest duty and privilege to love and serve God.

“Parents should be particular to make the worship of God an object lesson for their children. Passages of scripture should be more often on their lips, especially those passages that prepare the heart for religious service. The precious words might well be often repeated: ‘My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him’ (Psalm 62:5).” Testimonies, Vol. 6, 354

Tuesday

3 THE FIFTH COMMANDMENT

3.a. What are children required to do regarding their parents? Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:1–3

Note: “There is no period in life when children are excused from honoring their parents. This solemn obligation is binding upon every son and daughter and is one of the conditions to their prolonging their lives upon the land which the Lord will give the faithful. This is not a subject unworthy of notice, but a matter of vital importance. The promise is upon condition of obedience. If you obey, you shall live long in the land which the Lord your God gives you. If you disobey, you shall not prolong your life in that land.” The Adventist Home, 292, 293

“Children, do you desire eternal life? Then respect and honor your parents. Do not wound and grieve their hearts, and cause them to spend sleepless nights in anxiety and distress over your case. If you have sinned in not rendering love and obedience to them, begin now to redeem the past. You cannot afford to take any other course; for it means to you the loss of eternal life. The Heart-searcher knows what is your attitude toward your parents; for He is weighing moral character in the golden scales of the heavenly sanctuary. O, confess your neglect of your parents, confess your indifference toward them, and your contempt of God’s holy commandment.” The Youth’s Instructor, June 22, 1893

3.b. What is one of the signs of the soon coming of our Lord Jesus Christ? Romans 1:30; 2 Timothy 3:2

Note: “The sin which exists in this generation among children is that they are ‘disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God’ (2 Timothy 3:2, 4). And this state of things exists to such an extent that it is made a subject of prophecy as one of the signs that we are living in the last days of time.” Letters to Young Lovers, 53

“The word of God abounds in precepts and counsels enjoining respect for parents. It impresses upon the young the sacred duty of loving and cherishing those who have guided them through infancy, childhood, and youth, up to manhood and womanhood, and who are now in great degree dependent upon them for peace and happiness. The Bible gives no uncertain sound on this subject; nevertheless, its teachings have been greatly disregarded.” Fundamentals of Christian Education, 101

Wednesday

4 A THREEFOLD POWER

4.a. What family-related prophecy will be fulfilled in these last days? Malachi 4:5, 6; Luke 1:17

Note: “The restoration and uplifting of humanity begins in the home. The work of parents underlies every other. Society is composed of families, and is what the heads of families make it. Out of the heart are ‘the issues of life’ (Proverbs 4:23); and the heart of the community, of the church, and of the nation is the household. The well-being of society, the success of the church, the prosperity of the nation, depend upon home influences.” The Ministry of Healing, 349

“Those who bear the last message of mercy to the world should feel it their duty to instruct parents in regard to home religion. Their great reformatory movement must begin in presenting to fathers and mothers and children the principles of the law of God. As the claims of the law are presented, and men and women are convicted of their duty to render obedience, show them the responsibility of their decision, not only for themselves but for their children.” Child Guidance, 556

4.b. When fathers, mothers, and children are united in one happy family, what will be the result? Psalm 144:12

 Note: “More than human wisdom is needed by parents at every step, that they may understand how best to educate their children for a useful, happy life here, and for higher service and greater joy hereafter. Fathers and mothers, ever remember that to you is committed a sacred trust. The power of example is very great. If you fail to select proper society for your children and allow them to associate with persons of questionable morals, you place them or permit them to place themselves, in a school where lessons of depravity will be taught and practiced.” The Review and Herald, September 13, 1881

“Parents, you have a solemn responsibility resting upon you. It is your duty to cooperate with Christ in aiding your children to form right characters. Jesus can do nothing without your cooperation. It is not mercy or kindness to permit a child to have its own way, to submit to its rule, and to neglect to correct it on the ground that you love it too well to punish it. What kind of love is it that permits your child to develop traits of character that will make him and everyone else miserable? Away with such love! True love will look out for the present and eternal good of the soul.” Ibid., July 16, 1895

Thursday

5 FAITHFUL WORK REWARDED

5.a. In eternity—when the saved are secure in God’s kingdom—what will be the parents’ testimony? Isaiah 8:18

 Note: “When the judgment shall sit, and the books shall be opened; when the ‘well done’ of the great Judge is pronounced, and the crown of immortal glory is placed upon the brow of the victor, many will raise their crowns in sight of the assembled universe and, pointing to their mother, say, ‘She made me all I am through the grace of God. Her instruction, her prayers, have been blessed to my eternal salvation.’ ” Messages to Young People, 330

“Mothers, remember that in your work the Creator of the universe will give you help. In His strength, and through His name, you can lead your children to be overcomers. Teach them to look to God for strength. Tell them that He hears their prayers. Teach them to overcome evil with good. Teach them to exert an influence that is elevating and ennobling. Lead them to unite with God, and then they will have strength to resist the strongest temptation. They will then receive the reward of the overcomer.” Child Guidance, 172, 173

5.b. What will be the reward of the Christian family when they enter God’s kingdom? Psalm 132:12

 Note: “He [Jesus] tells you to be a partaker of His joy, and what is that? It is the joy of seeing of the travail of your soul, fathers. It is the joy of seeing that your efforts, mothers, are rewarded. Here are your children; the crown of life is upon their heads, and the angels of God immortalize the names of the mothers whose efforts have won their children to Jesus Christ.” Child Guidance, 567, 568

Friday

PERSONAL REVIEW QUESTIONS

1    What characterizes a true Christian family?

2    Name some successful key elements in rearing God-fearing children.

3    What special challenge do parents face in these last days?

4    Why will truly Christian homes become rare in the end of time?

5    What is needed in order to see our children in the kingdom of God?

Copyright 2000, Reformation Herald Publishing Association, 5240 Hollins Road, Roanoke, Virginia 24019-5048, U.S.A.